How would you respond if you’re on a first or second date with someone new and he or she makes an insulting remark to you? In the early days in a relationship, everyone is anxious and experimenting, and people may tell something that can be rude and disrespectful without them even realizing it. I would say that don’t tolerate if anyone is shutting you down, being rude, and shooting insulting comments towards you, particularly if they know you for a few days. Here are a few ways to deal with your date if he or she has been offensive and rude towards you.
Take a bathroom break
Excuse yourself by going to the bathroom or restroom is the simplest way to handle a situation when a new date made a rude remark. Going to the bathroom isn’t only a good way to not to react in a bad temper, but a way to access the situation in private. Once you’re alone, you can take a good look in the mirror, take a few deep breaths, and ask yourself how you will respond to it and what possible outcomes will result from it.
Avoid responding to the insults and switch the topic
If your new date has made a derogatory comment to you, and you don’t want to remove yourself from the situation physically, consider doing this instead. Look at your watch or phone, wait for five minutes, organize your feelings and then decide if you want to respond to his or her rude remarks. Switch the topic by asking your date a question. It will get your date talking, and instead of paying attention, you can now focus on that insulting comment, what did he or she say it, why is it bothering me and what is the best possible way to respond to it. Decide if you want to tell your date that you’re not interested in it now, or just wrap up the date, and talk to a friend about the subject later. Not reacting to the insult instantly, and thinking about it later, will help you to understand the issue in a new perspective.
Deal with it NOW, if you’re angry!
If a rude comment from your date made you angry, tell him or her that you’re upset about it. Don’t tolerate it. Tell that his or her rude behavior has hurt your feelings. Another approach is to mark your boundary. Remember, you’re in charge for your relationship. So be clear and nice about your expectations and preferences. Once you made it crystal clear what upset you, give your date a chance to explain it, and finally tell him or her, that you don’t want them to say anything like again. Keep in mind that, your date may become defensive if you made these statements with punishing or angry tone. So, avoid doing it, and say it in a soft and friendly voice instead.
If you’ve just gone for a first few dates with someone new, and your date said something that made you angry or upset, if could very well be an isolated incident. But, if this keeps on happening, then, then it’s very likely that your date is trying to upset you on a regular basis as long as you keep on dating him or her. So, to protect yourself from your date’s nasty insults and behavior, address the issue directly and ask the person to stop doing it. And if your date still keeps on doing it, then it’s probably in your best interests to abandon your date and look for someone more respectful.