Before we tell you if first dates are like job interviews, let us talk about speed dating events to get a perspective on the subject, and it isn’t pretty for the most part. When it comes to speed dating, when two people meet with their potential partners, a lot of normal behavior and reasoning goes out of the door. We only want to impress and get impressed. What we tend to forget is that connecting with someone gets complicated, when dating becomes a competition. In reality, most of us get more self-conscious and critical than we normally are.
These days first dates are more like interviewing for good jobs. We sell ourselves to get what we really want. At most speed, dating event men are more like potential candidates all prepped up with their resumes and accomplishments, while the women act like interviewers. If a woman isn’t happy or impressed by a man, they pass him up for a new guy, without even trying to engage or know him better.
It’s not surprising that most men and women feel dejected and disillusioned by the whole thing, as no one is trying to connect to each other personally. All they want to compete, impress, show off in their quest to find the perfect partner for their lives. However, this scenario isn’t only confined to speed dating events. You can see the same thing getting repeated in online dating as well. Often on most first dates, we either too hard to sell or judge our potential suitors too quickly. This habit hasn’t yielded us anything positive. But, that’s not the real problem. The real issue is we have the entire whole dating process all wrong.
So, we need to try a new tactic. Whenever you’re in a hurry to choose your partner, it prevents you from connecting to them on an emotional level. It’s highly likely that a lot of ladies dismissed some great guys because they misinterpreted something they said or thought that they were too anxious or nervous, or only found a reason that won’t work. Rather of investigating to find out what’s wrong, you need to be in the present and simply enjoy and cherish the moment. The similar tactic also applies to people who are trying too hard to impress other. How can you think of someone to have a connection with your date, when all you’re doing is convincing him or her to like you?
Well, you can do something different. Try to engage with someone without thinking whether if he is someone I can have a relationship with in the future. If you liked him, you didn’t try too hard to get his attention and on yourself. Eventually, you’ll realize that the whole dating things have become interesting and, of course, even fun.
Every person has a story to tell. If you date a woman for the first time and she doesn’t click with you straight away, don’t get discouraged. Instead, try to enjoy the dating experience and the moment. Try to get to know more about the person, instead of selling yourself or deciding immediately if he or she is compatible with you. Remember, you aren’t looking for a job here, you looking for a connection here with your potential partner. So, don’t rush, have fun and hope for the best.