We have all heard about second chances in relationships, but what warrants it? When we talk about second chances in relationships, it’s probably there has been some problems in the relationship, or the two parties have experienced some pain together. And if your boyfriend or girlfriend cause most of the problems in the relationship, or the other person is blaming you for all the troubles, then you may face a dilemma.
On the one hand, you care about this person, and you want to stay committed to the relationship. But, it’s also important that you take care of yourself and put yourself first. The question is when that time will come? How will you know that this relationship deserves a second chance? It’s a tough question, but some guidelines will help you to make a good decision for the well-being of yourself and your relationship.
A Relationship Deserves A Second Chance When:
1. You’ve been in a relationship your boyfriend or girlfriend for a long time. You both know each other very well on a genuinely and intimately. Within this period if you realize that there are some serious problems with your current partner regarding his or her character or integrity, or isn’t committed or trustworthy, it’s time that you leave this relationship. But if this person, despite all the pain he or she caused you, has demonstrated that he or she can be committed in the relationship, and has earned your trust throughout the relationship, then you can decide to give this person a second chance, and forgive him or her for their past activities.
2. Change is possible. This point is related with the first one. If you notice that your boyfriend or girlfriend has achieved some real personal growth and insight from this painful experience, then you might want to hear out your partner’s side of the story, and think about his or her request for a second chance. However, a simple sorry won’t be enough. Access yourself if real change is possible, and both of you are willing to invest your energy and time to make the change take place.
3. You received so much benefits and rewards from the relationship that you’re willing to forgive and work to address all the shortcomings. Every relationship has issues. We work on these issues because we like the good that we receive alongside these problems. The question is how much are you willing to put up with and find out how much are you getting from the relationship. However, it’s pointless to stay in a relationship where you’re always being abused and disrespected.
4. There are palliating circumstances. Be cautious about this particular point because you don’t want to give the other person a second chance, who refuses to take any responsibility if any problems appear in the relationship. However, sometimes situations arise in relationships, where one of the partners don’t act the way they’re supposed to act. Therefore, at least be willing to look into this possibility.
When you’re looking for someone, or in a relationship, keep in mind one important thing; take care of yourself. If you love and take care yourself, you will be more forgiving and work hard to salvage a relationship that is on the verge of destruction. By, taking care of yourself means that you’re acknowledging that it’s time to leave the relationships that aren't working anymore.