It can be difficult to maintain a relationship with someone who has a personality disorder. These relationships can inflict you with long-lasting emotional trauma. They can seriously destroy your self-esteem and even affect your physical health. In the worst case scenarios, you could be dragged into addictions and violence. People who have personality disorders often are rigid in their thinking. Their behaviors tend to be selfish, manipulative and power-hungry. They lack empathy and live according to their own version of the world. All of these traits really disrupt the communication and intimacy, the key components in a healthy relationship.
So how can you tell that the woman you are dating has personality issues? Below are some of the signs:
1. You feel like you are walking on thin ice; it could crack at any moment.
At the start of the relationship, you notice odd and intense reactions to things that most people would see as trivial. These reactions can get explosive, angry or jealous. Sometimes you will find that she won’t talk with you for a long period. She will make you feel guilty and take charge of the relationship. Your attempts to calm the situation appear futile and instead make matters worse. You see yourself apologizing for no reason just to resolve conflict and restore harmony. Over time you run out of strategies to resolve future conflicts and just give in to the whims and moods of your girlfriend. You become anxious about her attitude. You eventually lose yourself and your identity.
2. You begin to doubt yourself.
Men and women with personality disorders are often very convincing. They have such strong conviction about their own views that you are easily convinced by them and have second thoughts about your own perspective. It increases your sense of guilt and makes you highly apologetic after every argument or disagreement. You lose your confidence and courage to express your own views and become co-dependent.
3. You feel isolated and hopeless.
You want this relationship to survive. After all why wouldn’t you? You have already invested a lot of time and are emotionally attached despite all the warnings and advice from family and friends. Moreover, you assume that some of the problems in your relationship have been inflicted by them. You are desperate to fix your life and the relationship so you can prove them wrong. Therefore, you begin to avoid people and stop attending social gatherings. You might give up your hobbies, interests or goals. You have created an image of a perfect relationship which is nothing but a fantasy. You keep lying about it to your close friends, family, and even your co-workers. All of these things will bring nothing positive to your life except isolation and resentment. Hopelessness overwhelms you. You feel lost, stuck and you lack the strength to leave the relationship.
The negativity we talked about being in a relationship with a partner with personality disorder take a mental and physical toll on you. Anxiety, headaches, digestive problems, high blood pressure, insomnia, eating the wrong foods, drinking too much, or using drugs are some of them. So get out from this kind of relationships fast ASAP.