No one likes being lied to, which is why honesty is one of the most important traits people look for in a partner when it comes to relationships. But the truth is, we don’t hold the same principle when we blatantly lie to ourselves. Though they may seem harmless but keep telling these lies might prevent us from being in a loving relationship.
Here are five common lies about dating we tell ourselves which we should get rid off soon:
I won’t find love ever
Even if you don’t say or believe these words, this may point towards an unknown, nagging fear. You might believe this if you have failed to have a long-lasting relationship. You know that it’s a lie and don’t blur the lines between a fact and fear. However, you still didn’t find someone to be in a loving relationship that might be a fact. But believing that you will never find love in the future, is all about fear.
I don’t deserve more
This is a dangerous lie that will prevent you from exploring a new relationship. It will also keep you stuck whoever you are now. Individuals who believe this lie are afraid to get out from a dysfunctional or even an abusive relationship. It’s nonsensical to expect your partner to love, where even you don’t expect it. Consider talking with a relationship counselor if you believe in this lie. You should also talk about the relationships that led you believing this absurd notion in the first place.
It’s better to be in a bad relationship than being alone
Most people think that it’s better to be in a relationship with the wrong guy if they can’t find their match. The huge risk that comes with this lie is that people become accepting and comfortable with the wrong person over time. They stay in a lifeless and mediocre dating and relationship, which results in a marriage that can end with a divorce. Also, if you keep having a relationship with the wrong partner, there is greater chance that you’ll miss your right person meant for you.
Love, at first sight, mean a lot to me
Most people don’t just spare any time to know about themselves. They don't even recognize the essential qualities a person should have to be in a good relationship. These individuals often judge their first dates on delusional selection criteria like physical attractiveness or felt any “chemistry” with their dates. These people might dismiss a great person because they didn’t feel any chemistry right away or given any chance for the chemistry to develop. Or, they liked a person based on their physical attraction and chemistry without looking at other important traits required to be in a relationship.
If I ignore this bad thing, it will go away
Most people believe that however found something very undesirable in a partner, ignoring it will make it go away or they’ll forget about it. The truth is, it never go away. Follow your instincts, if it tells you this person isn’t your match. But sometimes, you don’t want him or her to know about it. That's a short-term solution. It will only delay the demise of your relationship. Not only are you emotionally wrecked, but you have also wasted months or even years being with the wrong partner. Moreover, in the process, you might have also missed out on better prospects.
The first crucial step to date wisely is to recognize and rejects the lies that will prevent you from having a great relationship. So, tell yourself the truth, and you’ll be ready and empowered to find a loving and long-term relationship.