The end of a relationship is painful. We're often left wondering what went wrong or how we could have done things differently. While many people move on after a breakup, some people are left longing for their ex. There is good news for these individuals: not all breakups are meant to be permanent. There are many couples who have broken up only to reunite later on and live happily ever after.
Read on to find out if you want to get back with your ex and five ways to ensure they'll want to get back with you.
Do you want your ex back?
The first thing to consider when revisiting an old relationship is if you truly want to get back with your ex. Here are some questions you should ask yourself before you start imagining your reunion.
Was I happy? This is the most important thing to consider. After a breakup, you might find yourself remembering all of the good times with your ex while ignoring the bad. You may want to sit down and make a list of the good times vs. the bad times. If you were happy for a majority of the relationship, then it might be worth getting back together.
Was it healthy? It is crucial to think of whether or not your relationship was healthy. Were the two of you goo for one another? Did you bring out the best or the worst in one another? If your relationship was constant drama and fighting, it wasn't healthy and probably not worth getting back together.
Why do I want my ex back? This one may be difficult to answer. You need to figure out why you want to reunite with your ex. Is it because you're lonely? Is it because you don't want them to be with someone else? Is it because you truly love them and believe that another try could work? If it is anything but the last question, you probably shouldn't get back together.
Five Psychological Tricks for Getting Your Ex Back
Once you've figured out if you truly want to get back together with your ex, it's time to see if they feel the same way. Everyone deals with a breakup differently and your ex may be moving forward in a complete different direction that you. The following are five ways of making sure that you and your ex are on the same page.
You'll be tempted to contact your ex and talk things over after you break up. Don't. It's one thing if you need to contact them for something important (No, “I left that shirt I wore one time 4 years ago at your place.” is not important.), but to contact them constantly is not okay. This behavior will only push them away and decrease the likelihood that they'll want to get back together.
If you want your ex to want you back, you need to keep the contact to a bare minimum…if any at all. Not hearing from you will make them miss you and wonder what you're up to. This will make them more likely to initiate conversation with you and lead to reuniting.
You need to use reverse psychology to encourage your ex to want you back. Make them think that you don't want them, and they'll want you. It might sound crazy, but reverse psychology has been proven to work in countless scenarios time after time.
While you're probably still hurt from your breakup, don't let it show. Whether you're mad, sad, or just straight-up confused, never let on on to any of that. You want your ex to see that you are mature and moving forward with life. You want to show that the breakup has had no effect on your life. This will only make you more desirable to them.
Don't Worry, Be Happy
Your ex probably thinks that you're hiding out at home, eating a pint of ice cream and crying over old photographs. Never let them think this…even if that's exactly what you're doing. You need to present a confident, carefree and happy image to the world.
Upload pictures of yourself having fun to your social media. Plan a vacation with friends and talk about it publicly. Let you ex see how happy and lighthearted you can be. This will only make them want to be back in your life more than ever.
Change Up Your Look
Remember in Grease when Sandy ditches her preppy dresses and opts for a wild hairstyle and leather pants? That's exactly what we're talking about here. You need to make a dramatic change to your appearance.
Whether it be a new hairstyle or a change of clothes, a different look will definitely get your ex's attention. They'll see how great you look now and wonder why they ever dumped you.
Build A Friendship
After a period of no-contact and once your ex has initiated conversation, work on building a good friendship with them. Don't jump right into getting back together. Don't argue over why the breakup happened. Keep it light and free of drama. Focus on what you really like about your ex and let them see what they really like about you. Invite them to do something the two of you used to enjoy and it will remind them of all the good times you had together. Once you can be together as friends, you can start working towards a better relationship.
While not every couple is destined to get back together, some couples just need some time apart to realize how much they mean to one another. You and your ex may be a couple that can bounce back from a breakup and be better than ever. Now you have all the info you need to see if you and your ex are destined for a reunion.