Anxiety. It happens to all of us. In fact, anxiety is among the biggest problems in relationships. When anxiety is caused by a relationship, we are programmed to think that our anxiety is the problem. We all agree that anxiety can kill the love in the relationship, strangle it, and destroy it. It makes most of us believe that anxiety and relationships can’t co-exist. Whenever we feel anxious, we should make sure that anxiety doesn't overwhelm us, otherwise it will ruin our relationships and marriages. Anxiety also adds pressure to other problems we are already facing in our relationships.
But what if anxiety wasn’t the problem and it was trying to tell us something important? Despite what people say, anxiety isn’t that dangerous. In fact, it can be a help to you. The key here is what we do with it. If you have relationship anxiety, here are some things you need to consider:
Acknowledge that anxiety in relationships is common.
Anxiety will be a part of your relationship if you are someone who is always worried or if you have a partner who doesn’t communicate with you often. We are social beings. We long for love, to feel connected, and to feel secure with our partners. We want to protect the love and connection we have with our significant others. So it’s common to feel anxious if we don’t feel connected.
Anxiety shows you care.
We feel worried and anxious about things we love and care about. Our relationships are the most important things in our lives. We care deeply about our love, our partner and keeping our relationship safe. We feel anxiety when our love and relationships are at risk, and this shows how deeply we care.
Find out what relationship challenge your anxiety is indicating.
If you are feeling relationship anxiety, take a moment and try to figure out what relationship challenge your anxiety is pointing to. Anxiety can be just about you and your vulnerabilities. You can feel anxious if you are stressed out. However, your anxiety may be from a specific problem in your relationship. Whether it be lack of communication, trust issues or intimacy issues, you need to identify the root of your anxiety. Find out the causes of your relationship anxiety and weed it out before it makes things worse.
Let go of your baggage.
When it comes to dating and relationships, we all have previous relationships experiences or “baggage.” We bring our previous experiences or baggage into our new relationships. This can spark fears and anxieties in the new relationship. Understand what kind of baggage you are bringing into your new relationship and identify if your anxiety is warranted. Do you feel anxiety over your new partner cheating because your previous partner cheated? You cannot apply the same issues from an old relationship to a new one. You need to drop the baggage. Doing this will make it easier for you to focus on actual problems, such as your communication and how to express your feelings to your partner.