All posts by Dating Guru

7 Biggest Complaints Women Have About Men

Women adore men. It’s just that certain behaviors actually make them insane. Some of these are so bad that if you don’t do anything about them, you’ll have a hard time landing a date! Anyways, here are some of the major complaints women have about the men they love.

1. Doesn’t Dress or Act Like A MAN
We all have to grow up at some point. So, ditch your cartoon t-shirts, please! Women absolutely hate it when they’ve to remind their boyfriends to dress and act like a mature man. There are a time and place to have fun and act like a teenager, but refusing to take responsibility and grow up can be a deal breaker for most women who are looking for a mature to be in a committed relationship.

2. Mr. Angry
A man with this trait is a difficult type to deal with when it comes to relationships. Women feel very fragile like eggshells when they’re with a guy who seems to be always angry at the world. So, guys, cool yourself down, if you don’t want your girlfriend to run away from you.

3. Mr. Possessive
Similar to angry guys, it’s also hard to date someone who treats their women like possessions. Women want men to be a part of their lives, not their possessions. Don’t check up on your girlfriend constantly, grill her if she has any friends of the opposite sex, or does she keep any contact with her exes. Also, stop telling her what she can and can’t do.

4. Everything Is About You
Women want their partners to pay attention to things they like, and take an interest in their lives and themselves. They don’t want to be with guys who are overly self-obsessed and doesn’t show any interests to their partners’ needs or wants. If you desire to have a successful relationship, then both partners should be caring and watchful of each other’s needs.

5. It’s All Talk, No Action
Women have a big problem with men whose words aren’t followed by actions. Some men say they’re going to something, but in the end, they don’t follow through. One simple would be that if a man promised his girlfriend that he would call her or take her on a dinner date, but in the end, he does none of it. Guys, be open and honest about who you are and where you are in life. If you get that right, your women will love and respect your more than ever.

6. Too Much, Too Fast
Another big complaint ladies have against men is that they rush into things too soon in the relationship. We are talking about those guys who in their second or third date start having a conversation regarding marriage, kids, family, etc. Some women may find this very invasive of their personal space. These sensitive topics can only be discussed when both parties are in an exclusive and committed relationship.

7. You’re Not Fully Honest About What You Want
This is by far one of the biggest complaints we see from women about guys. We see men tell a woman that they ready to pursue her, commit to her, but later when things start to get serious, they freak out, or in some case disappear. If men could be genuine with themselves, their partners, and what they want from the relationship, women would appreciate them more.

What Is Your Dating Type? The Physical Or The Emotional?

If you’ve been dating for a while and found that your dates aren’t turning into full-fledged relationships, it’s highly likely that you aren’t dating someone who is your type. Maybe you’re confused about your dating type. Either you’re going for the wrong physical type or the wrong emotional type.

Read on to find out more:

Your Physical Type
When you’re out dating people, do they have a particular physical type? Are you dating men or women who have specific physical attributes that you like? For example, do you see people with particular hair color or physique? Is the age of your date important to you? We mean that do you like dating someone older or younger than you? Do you date people who have tattoos or piercings? Do you date people who dress differently like a “Goth”? Do you like your men to be clean shaved, goatee or with a full beard? When you’re dating, think about all the physical traits that get you feel attracted to someone as it might help you assess what kind of people you like.

Your Emotional Type
Think for some time and describe the emotional type of individuals you feel attracted to? For example, are you attracted to people who are narcissists or selfless? Ask yourself if you’re attracted to passive types who do what you want, sarcastic types, alpha types who take command, depressive types, serious types, introvert types, extrovert types, “life of the party types,” etc. To make it easy recall your past relationship and the type of your person your date was at that time.

How To Figure Out you’re dating either the wrong physical type or the wrong emotional type?
When you’re dating someone not right for you, whether the wrong physical type or emotional type, you’ll realize that there is a pattern that your dates aren’t turning into full-blown relationships. Sure, you’ve second and even a third dates, but nothing happens beyond that. Also, if you happen to turn your dates into relationships, it fizzles out within a month or two. In short, no matter what you do, your dates don’t turn into long-term relationships. You can also tell that you’re dating the wrong type is when your friends or family tell your straightaway that the person you’re dating isn’t your kind.

So, what can you do to turn your dates into committed, long-term relationships? Plain and simple, consider dating people whom you would ever think of dating before. But, make sure that they’re good, decent and outstanding folks. Ask out the woman who has a different ethnicity or cultural background than yours, or date the guy who is bald or a little weight.

Remember, flexibility and openness to accept different things are essential in finding a great relationship. People may be different when it comes to a physical feature, or how much money he or she has, or how emotional or angry he or she is, but deep down inside we all want the same thing. That is a having an emotional and intimate connection with someone who loves us consistently, and someone we can trust to be there for us, support us, and comfort us in the future.

Want Some Incredible Insights About Relationships? Read On!

Relationships go down mainly when communication breaks down, blaming each other instead of taking accountability, trust is destroyed, and failure to show appreciation for each other. So, what can you do not to allow these problems creep into your existing relationships? Here are some surprising insights.

• We make our own choices. We make them every day. We have the choice of being in relationships with the people we meet. We have the option to make a person smile, laugh, change or motivate him or her, etc. We have the choice to treat people around us better. Think about how many times you failed to connect with someone when you met him or her, or making a good friend because you failed to smile, or to say ‘hello,’ or do something nice for them. Remember, proactive choices always bring in good results.

• Trust people. Things would have been much better if we started to treat people with good intentions and trusted them more. Trust is essential if you want to have a healthy and long-term relationship. If you trusted your partner more, suspicion disappears, and the possibilities of misinterpreting your partner’s opinions, behavior and action decrease. Trust people more, unless you have a good reason not to trust.

• Don’t have expectations of other people. You’re the controller of your life. Don’t put expectations on other people or your boyfriend/girlfriend, unless you want to see yourself set for disappointment and failure. We can encourage others, challenge them, and hold them responsible for their actions, but eventually, we will get disappointed or discouraged if we keep expecting things from them. Instead, we need to focus on your own qualities, time, energy, and our own impact on our relationships. Now, see the results unfold for itself.

• Be thankful. Be thankful and appreciate all the good things that have happened to in your relationship. When we realize how much we have to be thankful for, and actively and compassionate understand and recognize those things, we become happier.

• Living life to the fullest doesn’t exist. Most people always like to relish only the pain and the agony in their relationships excluding all the good things their relationships have given them. They like to talk about all the bad things that have happened to them or how their partners are making them feel miserable. Then there are the usual banters about finances, why the other partner is less responsible in the relationship, and so on. The truth is we all can have happy and fulfilling lives if we choose to, despite all the chaos or how pessimistic things are around us. Don’t be the victim. It's impossible to control what will happen to you, but you can control how you react to it.

• People are beautiful. It’s your responsibility to find the beauty in them. Many men and women looking for a relationship approach their dates with an expectation and to prove themselves how great they are. They only tell about themselves, and after the date, you start wondering that the other person didn’t ask anything about you, your life, or your interests. It’s upsetting and exhausting. Instead, you’ll feel better about yourself if you be curious and have the desire to learn more about other people.

Should You Settle For A Man or Woman You Haven’t Met in Person?

When it comes to online dating, some men and women become so obsessed with someone they’ve met online that they can’t let them go or forget about them. In spite their matches told them they don’t like them, don’t treat you well and even has refused to meet them in person, they still have love and affection for him or her. This is preposterous, but it happens.

They know that this isn’t right, and want to move on. But, how? Here are some helpful tips to help you to get past this phase.

First things, first. If your online partner has made it clear that he or she won’t meet you, and they would be a terrible partner for you, believe it. Stop thinking about him or her, and don’t try to meet or win them again. Now, let’s talk about the feelings for him or her. We understand they might be significant, but if you haven’t even met them even once, then they’re simply feelings and emotions you’ve about them. They aren’t about them; it’s all about your desperate desire to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. So, the primary concern here is – you. You’ve decided to be in a relationship with someone who treats you isn’t worthy of your love. He or she hasn’t even been caring or kind enough to meet you. It shows that you’re very needy and insecure, and you might be easily be mistreated by others.

Therefore, the best course of action here would be is to raise your standards. Finding a person who is right for can be very, very hard. But, settling for a man or woman who isn’t right for you is wrong. Tell yourself that you deserve a better partner. Tell yourself you want to be with someone who will treat you with kindness and respect. Sometimes, you’ll find it difficult to say, believe or even relate to it, but say it anyways. Write it in your journal. Tell it all aloud when you wake up in the morning. At first, they won’t mean much to you, but as you continue repeating them, it will help you to set up a standard and will remind you to stay away from someone who is the right partner for you.

Also, raise your standards for how you’re treated, not just in romantic relationships. If someone says something demeaning or offensive to you, don’t reply back. Instead, give them a confused look and get away from it. Fight or arguing here is futile. Walk away from anyone who tries to put you down. Stand up for yourself. Keep doing it for a while, and notice how you gain strength from within. A significant advantage of this process is that it will help you to reject all the negative ideas and thoughts others are projecting onto you.

Go to people who will offer you the care, respect and the kindness you deserve. Join a local support group, meet your close friends and family members, and if you can afford it, visit a therapist. Surrounding yourself with kind, compassionate people will help to with the difficulties of finding a partner. There won’t be instant results, but surrounding yourself with good people friends and family will make the pain of loneliness more manageable, and continue with your life, with or without a partner.

Are You Being Stigmatized Because You Don’t Have A Boyfriend?

There are no relationships without issues. There are fights, arguments, and misunderstandings among the partners and some relationships are so problematic that there isn’t anything to do other than ending it. That’s not all. Couples tend to blame each other for the demise of their relationship, while some men and women held themselves fully accountable for it.

Sometimes, things get out of control so much that these people, particularly women, are stigmatized or frowned upon, which makes it tough for them to find someone new, and start anew. These women begin to believe that there is something wrong with them, and that’s why no man would like to date them or don’t want to be in a committed and long-term relationship with them.

So, what can you do about this sad incident?

First, forgive yourself. You apparently loved your ex in your previous relationships, and you had to get out the relationship because you and your boyfriend weren’t compatible with each other, or the relationship ran out love. Therefore, forgive yourself. It wasn’t your fault.

Now, let’s talk what other people think of you. The truth is you can’t control what other folks think about you. You can only control yourself. It’s slow, but it works. Most people talk about improving their self-esteem after a breakup or when they can’t find someone. But, we never found that very helpful.

How are you supposed to improve your self-esteem when you feel depressed and worn out? So instead, of working on your self-esteem, we believe working on your self-respect will be more fruitful. It’s a lot simpler to gain self-respect. Only behave in a way that you find respectful. Think about the people you respect. Notice how they act. What behaviors do you see in them that make you think highly of them? Do their kindness and courtesy attract you? Is it that they don’t like someone who gets dragged down? Do you like how they support someone who needs it? Do you like someone who is confident and humble at the same time?

Now, ask yourself, are you that person? If not can you be that person? Even if you be that person, it won’t immediately change the way others see you. But, it surely will reduce the influence they’ve over you. When you’ve self-respect, you’ll realize that something funny will happen, when people around you try to make you feel about yourself. That is it won’t like it used to. Having self-respect also helps you to develop good taste in people. You can evaluate which kinds of people treat others, good or bad. Also, those people will see it in you. It’s like a magical power, and we all know these magical powers don’t come overnight.

Self-respect also instills self-compassion in you. If you say something wrong or bad-mouthing someone, or even self-deprecating yourself – don’t make this all about yourself. Don’t beat yourself for it. Don’t tell yourself that you behaved badly. Don’t think your honesty and compassion is running low. Changes come slowly. So, the next time, you’re looking for someone, and they didn’t find you attractive, remind yourself that everything is fine, and you’ll do better next time.

3 Reasons You’re Always Attracting Men Who Won’t Commit

We keep hearing the same thing over and over again from women looking for a committed relationship. What’s wrong with men today? No matter how hard they try or confident they tend to feel, most of them happen to date guys who just don’t want a commitment. Then there are the men want to get married labeled as boring and the ones who don’t are hot and sexy but are eccentric when it comes to settling for an exclusive and long-term relationship.

If you’re one of those people having a hard time meeting committal men or women, then the actual problem isn’t with the selection out there. It’s within your own mind. You can keep blaming all the singles in your age group, the quality of men and women looking for dates online, or the lack of people you like to have a committed relationship out there. This is, in fact, a trick played by your subconscious mind to shift the responsibility to some external circumstances, and distract you from the real truth or what is actually happening. You will change your results when you find the truth. You see everything around us is driven by a cause.

In other words, for every effect, there is a cause. To get this into perspective, at first, you need to look at your results. For example, an effect will be if you’re persistently attracting non-committal men and women. Next, you’ve to understand what is causing the effect you’re experiencing at the moment. When you look at things outside of yourself for the cause, you lack the power that is needed to change it. If you for the cause within yourself, you can be empowered in transforming your experiences and attracting the kind of love you desire.

Now, if you are sure about what you were feeling or thinking to cause it, it’s very likely that you would have changed it that is if you really don’t want to have any love. Anyways, here are the main reasons why you may be attracting partners who won’t commit to a long-term relationship.

1. You aren’t committed to having a boyfriend or a girlfriend and are unaware of it. There is high chance that your subconscious mind is telling you to remain single. The solution here is to ask yourself what benefits are you receiving from staying single and is it worth abandoning these benefits to be in a committed relationship.

2. You’re looking for a quick fix for love. People who are looking for fast love usually say all the right things, and do all the right things to create an instant relationship. However, these instant relationships end as quickly as they conceive. The solution here is to address the root causes of why you want to have a quick fix for love. If you tackle this issue, you’ll stop attracting men and women who are into short-term relationships.

3. You’re scared of emotional intimacy with someone you love. It’s not only that emotional intimacy makes you worried, but you also don’t want to deal with emotional intimacy. All you want is physical or sexual intimacy with him or her, as it’s much easier than emotional intimacy. The solution here is to deal with tragedies of your past relationship that has made you feel afraid of fully opening up to a partner. If you’re scared of getting too intimate physically or emotionally, you’ll also be less confident and afraid to do the deep work required to heal this problem.

Date Like A Financial Planner To Find A Successful Relationship

Believe it or not – dating like a financial planner is one the best ways to be in a healthy and successful relationship. Here’s why.

Often, men and women are more thoughtful and careful than how to be responsible with their money than choosing romantic partners right for them. A lot of people get lured into bad relationships daily, but very few find themselves in bad investment or making poor financial decisions where they lose some or all of their wealth. How does this happen?

The answer is obvious. We are more careful with money because we can’t live without it. You don’t squander money or make risky investments because you don’t have money to lose or can afford to. On the flip side, men and women take risks with relationships. The reason is interesting and confusing at the same time. People sometimes date people whom they know can break their heart and hurt their feelings and they think that the immense emotional pain associated with a breakup is something they can deal with. But, if you’ve approached your love life like a financial planner, it’s like saying that you’ll fine if you risk losing some or all of your money. Well, that doesn’t make any sense right? The thing is if you’ve invested in a relationship, and you had taken your emotions and feelings like money, you would be much more careful about whom you’ve decided to date.

So, what can you do about it?

Do Your Research
Any seasoned investor will do their research before they commit to the investment. But, when it comes to romantic relationships, it’s otherwise. Many men and women rushed and took things too fast in dating and their relationships, ignored all the red flags, and got their hearts crushed. Men and women who take things too fast in their relationships just want to feel happy, and they want to feel those feelings immediately. But, the right way to start a relationship is to take things slowly, spend time together once or twice per week for a few months, and try to know him or her in different situations. This way your feelings for the other person will develop gradually, you won’t keep thinking about him or her all the time, or introduce that person to your friends or family or keep thinking that you’ve found the man or the woman of your dreams.

Back Off Before You Lose Too Much
Wise investors will get out of an investment if they find that they’re losing money or making less profit. If you’ve have been dating someone for some time, and realize that you’re losing interest or feeling unhappy in the relationship, then your best course of action will be to leave it before it’s too late to mend you broken heart.

Note Down Your Bad Days
If you see that your relationship is taking an unfortunate turn, document it in a journal or calendar, and mark it to remind yourself that this is a miserable day in your relationship. When you notice there are more unhappy days than happy ones in the relationship, and you decided to stay put, then it’s because you’ve low self-esteem and desperate to be in a relationship. And you deserved it.

What To Do If Your Boyfriend Is Getting Back With His Ex

So you started dating someone you like, and everything is going great. You and your boyfriend are making plans to make your relationship exclusive, and then all of a sudden this happened. You boyfriend got a call from his ex. After having a conversation with his ex, your partner tells you that it messed up his head, and he’s no longer interested in continuing the relationship with you. He said that he decided to get back with the ex who has hurt him badly, and if it doesn’t work out, he will return to you again and make things as they were. You feel blindsided and confused whether you’ll keep dating him or break up with him or, you’re willing to give him some space and time and get his mind right.

Incidents like these are pretty common in relationships, and results are often mixed. Sometimes getting back with your ex, and sometimes it doesn’t. And in the mean, you also ruined the relationship with the new person you’ve been dating. In this situation, what will be the best course of action here?

First, let us clarify that our advice should not be taken personally. It can take people a long time to get over exes. And if that ex keeps pulling you back or you keep thinking about him or her all the time, it will get even harder and longer. Your exes can mess up your heads. Whenever your current partner decides to return to their, and they tell you that they aren’t sure about it, believe it. The truth is there’s no absolute way to know what’s going on with him. It’s uncertain whether their exes will take back your current boyfriend, or whether you’ll be ready, in case, to take him back, if it doesn’t work out with their exes. Therefore, let him deal with his stuff. You, meanwhile, be kind to yourself. We understand this is one big unfortunate event in your life, and you’ll feel bad for some time. Dealing with a break up is very, very hard, and it’s fine to allow yourself to feel miserable for a while.

But, keep in mind; don’t ever feel bad for feeling bad. You’re grieving the loss of your relationship as well as sulking about all the joy, happiness and the hope it gave you. So, if your thinking of binge watching all the movies you like alongside a bucket of fried chicken, or a huge tub of ice cream, go for it. If you begin to criticizing yourself for feeling upset, tell yourself that, “It’s okay to be sad. We all feel sad sometimes. It’s challenging and painful, but it’s temporary, and it will pass.”

Most of us assume that if we suppress or withhold our feelings and emotions, it will go away. But it’s not true, and it doesn’t work like that. When you allow the disappointments and frustrations to exist only, rather that hiding it, then coping with it becomes much easy and makes you more patient.

Meanwhile, being kind to yourself doesn’t just mean watching TV and indulging in snacks. It also means taking care of yourself like working out, eating healthy, being physically active by playing sports, taking yoga classes and so on. Physical pain and emotional pain are synonymous. So if you take care of yourself physically, your mental problems will be solved too. If you can do that, you may start to think about whether you are ready to get him back. After all, it’s your life and you’re in full control of it.

Knowing How To Talk To A Man Is Everything In Relationships

Have you ever been in a position where you tried to communicate your feelings to a guy only to push him away? Some women feel so insecure and helpless in expressing and communicating their feelings to a man that they decide not to talk at all. Even if they did, they would eventually tell him something that will a big turnoff to them. So, how can you address this?

Here are some suggestions for you to ponder.

Forget The Misconception That Men Are Scared Of Feelings
I bet a lot of you’ve heard this that guys don’t like feelings, and don’t like to talk about their feelings as well. Many women had also experienced this personally in a painful way when they tried to talk about their feelings with their boyfriends. But, that’s not true. Men aren’t scared of feelings at all. What they don’t like is the “drama” that follows when we express our anger, pain, and disappointment in the wrong way. It’s a total turnoff for men, and they become defensive, and labeling you as “dramatic,” “desperate” or “needy.”

Don’t Try To Conceal What You’re Really Feeling
Whenever we’ve expressed a feeling to a man and notice him withdraw, we start doing something else. We forget our feelings and pretend it’s missing. When he asks if anything is wrong, we look somewhere else, and say, “Nothing’s wrong.” Instead, of doing good, this will create more distance between you and him. Because he apparently has figured out that there is something wrong with you and you aren’t telling him the truth. He starts to wonder whether he’s getting the whole picture with you, and as you’re hiding a lot of things from, your man might never know exactly how you are feeling! Therefore, the best way to do this is simply getting in touch with your man and tells him what’s really happening with you.

Reach His Heart By Using The Right Words
What you say a man affects him and influences him. Certain words will distant him away from you, and you’ll feel like you’re losing him too. Then some words will pull him towards you like a magnet, and you’ll feel that you’re the most valuable thing to him in the whole world. If you approach him with an accusation such “You don’t love me anymore,” you won’t believe what you intended, rather, it will make him defensive, and you’ll create more unwanted tension. But, if you focus on your feelings and tell him, “I feel very secure, if you love me more,” the situation will be entirely different. Here, you aren’t making him feel like a bad man, in fact, you’re expressing who you are and what you want. Now, follow up your feeling with a negotiation like, “What can we both do together to be happier?” This statement will have an incredible effect on him and will make him think he has the woman of his dreams. He will believe that he has found a woman who is true to herself and respected him to make the relationship even better.

Overall, if you’re looking for someone, practice these tips the next time you’re feeling disappointed with a man, and notice how things change for the better.

3 Things To Look For In Man To Findout He’s Keeper Or Not

Ever dated someone, and after some time into the relationship, you keep wondering whether your relationship with your boyfriend is worthwhile or not? You know he is a great and decent man, but you can’t make a solid decision if he’s the man of your dreams with whom you wanted to spend the rest of your life with? You keep fighting and debating this with yourself, and the more you go on like this, the crazier it gets. Right? The truth is deciding the person to spend the rest your life with is by far the most challenging and tough decisions a person will ever make.

Here are three signs which will help you decide whether the guy you’re dating is worthy in your life or not:

1. You are Happy and Fulfilled
If you’re with someone, who makes you feel consistently happy and fulfilled, that he’s the man you should be having a relationship. We understand that it’s impossible for two people to see things and agree all the time. But, a relationship can only be successful when both partners can consistently meet and satisfy the needs of each other. And if your boyfriend or girlfriend can do this persistently from the beginning of the relationship, then your chances of having the kind of marriage and relationship that you truly desire increases. On the flipside, if you’re having a relationship with someone who consistently makes feel upset, angry, resentful, and frustrated, then we can safely say that your needs aren’t being met, and probably won’t be fulfilled in the future.

2. He’s Responsible and Honors His Agreements
When choosing a partner, the character is one of the most important deciding factors. Our life is rife with challenges and uncertainty, so it’s crucial that you’ve someone in your life, you can help you tackle and manage the hurdles. You can easily find this about a guy by seeing how responsible a man is with his life and the way he leads his life. Does he live his life responsibly? Is he responsible with his finances? Does he have a stable job or career? Is he dedicated to his career, and in other parts of his life? Also, try to find out whether he is the kind of man who keeps his agreements and honors his promises. Find out if he is the type of man who disappears or makes excuses if things don’t go right. Pick a partner who acts responsibly and keeps his agreements. Remember, not being able to communicate and working together are main reasons why many relationships and marriages fall apart.

3. He Treats People With Respect
When you’re dating someone new, you can tell a lot about a person by seeing how a person treats others. Just observe how your new man treats others and interacts with strangers on a daily basis. This will give you a clear picture of what he’s going to be like in a relationship. If a man belittles and disrespects other people all the time, but treats you well, there is a chance that one day you will become a victim of his venomous attitude. But, if the guy consistently treats others with kindness and respect, and compassion, it’s highly likely he’ll do the same to you, no matter how bad things become.