All posts by Dating Guru

How To Cleanse Your Dating Life And Start A New

Sometimes dating can be quite exhausting and draining on your soul. If your last attempts to find everlasting love ended up in failure, it’s okay to feel depleted and frustrated. If you need to get back in the game again, it’s essential that you flush your dating fatigue, and start afresh.

Here are four ways to cleanse yourself of all the fatigue and disappointment so that you can have a fresh beginning:

1. Let Go Of The Past
You can never start afresh when you’re still sulking about your past relationships. Unsuccessful dates often leave dents in us such as unresolved grievances, unmet desires and never-ending regrets and sorrows. These negative emotions are toxic for our emotional well-being. Also, these will act as barriers for you to find love again. One of the crucial steps for dating detox is to forget the past and move on. This isn’t an approach to benefit those you have rejected you, but it will also remove everything that’s holding you back from finding true love.

2. Be Careful Of What You Consume
Rather than foods, here we are talking about your intake of thoughts, advice, words, and photos related to romantic relationships. Avoid having a conversation with your friends who always complain how hard is to find love a decent boyfriend or girlfriend. Also, distance yourself from family members who are complaining how pathetic their relationships are. Only watch movies and music that are uplifting and inspires hope and optimism. When you feel that your mood is starting to sink, do something productive about it. Even small changes in your daily routine and ‘intakes’ can yield surprising results.

3. Rebuild Yourself
Dating detoxes aren’t all about getting rid of your negative emotions and behaviors. It’s about replacing your old ones with something better. In this step, first, envisage what kind of boyfriend or girlfriend you aspire to be. Now, make a list of all the qualities that will help be that person. Check if there are any qualities that you don’t have. Next, describe the kind of partner you like to have a relationship with in detail. This will help you to filter all the people that don’t quite match to your preferences and will also save you from another heartbreak.

4. Destress
Health professionals have pointed out that too much stress has a negative impact on humans including the body’s natural detox system. Stress is inevitable when it comes to dating and relationships. Many men and women have reported that they sometimes feel stressed out, and most of them admitted that it is affecting their relationship negatively. Typical pressures on daters include things like, “Did I do something wrong? Or why isn’t he calling me back? Or Do I look attractive to him/her?” and so on. Take a deep breath and relax. Putting less pressure on your relationships and life, make love easier for individuals. They feel happy to be in love. And happy people make healthy and loving romantic couples.

Breakup, rejections and heartbreaks are a part of the dating process. If you’re in a relationship, all of these things can happen to you. That’s why when it happens; everyone needs to have a dating detox now and then before they get back into the dating scene in their quest to find lasting love.


Is it a Good Idea to Date These Certain Types of People?

Do you think dating people who you see every day is suitable? We’ve created a list of people around you who may seem to be good dating choices, but at the end of the relationship, they just test your shrewdness.

1. The Coworker
Anyone can fall in love at any place, at any time. And it can happen at work too. As we spend most of the time at work, it's no surprise that people may fall in love with their coworkers. There are some common issues that the colleagues face. Both of you have to commiserate with the boss, brainstorm over an important project, or about upcoming changes at work, without fear of annoying each other.

Your colleagues may not take your love affair well in your office area. If you more concentrate on the relationship, if they sense your productivity is lacking, they may report to your boss. Dating someone at the office means you’re taking a high risk, you take it as a resourceful way to be excited about work. If you still want to date your coworkers, tell your supervisors about it, as most companies have rules for interoffice dating.

2. The Boss
In a professional environment, dating a person in a superior position than yours is a bad idea. It’s flattering that your boss wants to date you. And, we also understand why men and women are attracted to a person with power. It’s totally understandable why dating your boss seems like a very good idea if you want preferential treatment at work, or want to get promotion fast. But, remember, one thing, no matter how good you work or nice, your coworkers will resent you and talk behind your back. And, if and when the relationship ends, it’s highly likely that you’ll lose both your new love interest and your job.

3. A Friend’s Sibling
Dating a friend’s sibling is sensitive. You think his or her family is your family and your family is his or her family. If you are thinking to date a friend’s family member, like your friend’s sister or brother, keep in mind, that your relationship between you and your friend will change. You may be his or her best friends, but your friends might oppose of you being his or her brother’s or sister’s love interest. Also, once the romantic relationship fizzles, you may lose your best friend. If you must need to date a friend’s sibling, you need to first think long and hard about the consequences of such relationships in the long-run.

4. The Neighbor
Many of us may have the attractive individual next door. You see this guy or gal out in the yard, grocery store, cleaners, gas station and so on. One beautiful summer day while you are mowing the lawn or washing the car or just enjoy a cup of coffee; it’s natural to catch up with bordering buddy Mr. Handsome. Very soon you two get pretty intimate, go for dinner dates, and partake in casual TV-watching. Dating a neighbor is certainly desirable because there’s no traveling involved. But before asking him or her out, you should weigh the pros and cons of getting involved with someone who lives so close. Because should your relationship goes south, you will run into your old flame frequently including at grocery stores, gas station, farmer’s market, etc.

5. Your Ex or Your Friend’s Ex
We call it a break up because the relationship is broken. Dating your ex or revisiting a past relationship for the hope of a dramatic change in your life is meaningless. You may expect a second chance, or maybe you rightfully deserve one but don’t expect miracles. There is no guarantee that a second chance will reignite the fire the romance in your old relationship, nor will it make it work.


Is Voice Important In Choosing A Girlfriend Or Boyfriend?

When it comes to love and relationship, the voice qualities of men and women appears to convey biological information about each other’s perceived attraction level, health, and fertility to a potential partner.

Voices play a significant role in measuring the perceived attractiveness of a man or a woman. The more attractive a voice is to hear, the more likely the person’s body is said to be symmetrical and perceived to be more physically attractive. Symmetry is vital as it transmits basic physical survival instincts and fertility information to a potential match. It’s critical to remember that symmetry and body mass index (BMI) isn’t similar. There are three variations of symmetry that matter involving voice perceived attractiveness of an individual to the opposite sex. They are:

For Men – Shoulder-To-Hip Ratio (SHP)
Men are assumed to be more attractive and sexually promiscuous when they’ve wider shoulders coupled with narrower hips. Men, whose bodies have this symmetry, have two to three times more sexual partners in their lifetime compared to men who don’t have this symmetry in their bodies.

For Women – Waist-To-Hip Ratio (WHP)
Women are perceived to be more attractive when they have a narrower waistline and broader shoulders and hips than women whose shoulders, waistline and hips are relatively even in size. In short, women with “hourglass” figures are very attractive and sexy. Another notable thing to note here is if a woman’s voice is attractive, it indicates she can be promiscuous.

For Men And Women – Left-To-Right Side Ratio (LRR)
For most people, there are differences in sizes between the left and right halves of their bodies. However, the lesser the disparity between the left and right halves of their bodies, including facial features, the more attractive the man or the woman is as to those who have more differences.

Now, let’s talk voices. It’s been found that men are attracted to women who have high-pitched voices. In fact, most men can assess the symmetry, and hence attractiveness, of a female’s face and other physical features simply by listening to her voice. The female hormone, Estrogen, which is responsible for female looking faces, is also linked to causing both high pitched voices and enhancing the attractiveness of a woman’s face.

On the other hand, women can predict a guy’s heaviness and BMI by listening to his voice. Keep his weight aside, the lower the pitch of a man is, the more attractive he is perceived, and the more balanced his body will be. Guys, who are more symmetrical than others are deemed attractive because they also have high self-esteem. As these men had high self-esteem throughout their lives, they feel more confident and secure about themselves. These two qualities are very attractive to women.

The bottom line is when looking for a girlfriend or a boyfriend, attraction and chemistry play vital roles. The attraction and chemistry we feel when we like someone arises from a combination of senses, including the sound of a person’s voice. So, if you shut your eyes, and attentively listen to the voice of someone you’re attracted, and love what you hear, then it’s highly likely that you will like what you see when you open your eyes.


4 Ways To Stop Comparing Your New Dates to Your Ex

If you’ve ended your relationship with your partner recently, and trying your best to get over your ex and move on, but finding it difficult to do it, then you aren’t alone. Every time you get to meet someone new, you start comparing him or her with your ex, making it harder for you to establish a connection with your new love interest. By always thinking and comparing your new dates with your ex, you are sabotaging your chances of finding love again. Your past girlfriend or boyfriend might be great and wonderful, but he or she is no longer with you. The truth is that you can do much better than your ex. You can fall in love with someone who respects you, is committed to you, and will be loving and compassionate towards you.

These four tips that will help you quit the habit of comparing your new love interests with your former lovers:

1. Change your romanticized view of your past. You need to get clear about your past relationship and all the faults of your former boyfriend or girlfriend. Do this without being angry or resenting your ex. The key thing here for you is to focus on moving forward by acknowledging the fact that your relationship wasn’t healthy. There was a significant gap in your relationship, but you aren’t entirely sure what it is. Even if your ex was a smart, fun, attractive, or whatever person, you both didn’t have any real chemistry and emotional connection that is required to be in a committed and exclusive long-term relationship.

2. Don’t rush into making irrational decisions. Most people think that they can evaluate their romantic partners by just talking with them for a few minutes. While it is relatively easy to know whether you’re instantly attracted to someone, finding out if both of you share common interests and goals is vital to be compatible with one another. Enjoying a lasting relationship is tough if two people in a relationship aren’t compatible or don’t enjoy to spend time together. So, don’t make a mistake by believing that you can assess a date after just spending just a small amount of time together. Sometimes, your instincts will tell you that, ‘this man or the woman is the perfect one for you.' If that happens, fight your well-rooted intuition, and dismiss them.

3. Look for the hidden behaviors. Most of the hidden traits found in a person are hidden. When you feel nervous when meeting him or her for the first time, the nervousness that you feel is just one of the many feelings that can be seen. If you have a pattern of pushing women away because you think that they won’t be good enough for you, do yourself a favor. Find out one or two good traits of your date, and spend some time with her. Make it your goal. Don’t just reject a woman simply for the reason that you can’t immediately appreciate what makes her unique and extraordinary.

4. Remember the most critical dimension in a relationship. As you all probably know, flexibility is one of the most crucial elements of any relationship. You can be happy and can make your relationship healthy and long-lasting if you’re flexible, and the woman you’re dating or in a relationship share the same qualities of flexibility like you. Flexible men and women make life work and easy for them. Flexible couples often find the best of each other, and they will find the best way to deal with any issues facing their relationships. Cultivating a spirit of flexibility within yourself, while looking for a date or a relationship will make the whole experience fast-paced and exciting from slow and frustrating.


3 Reasons Why Men Don’t Call Back

You met a great guy and had a nice date. You had a very good time, he made you laugh, and it seems to you that you’ve a connection. He asks for your phone number and happily wrote it down for him. You come and keep wondering when he will call back. The next day comes and goes, and he didn’t call. It's okay; it can happen. A few days pass, and he still hasn't called you back. You get worried, and you start thinking what went wrong? Why hasn’t he called?

Here are three main reasons why a man won’t call you back, even after you thought that both of you’ve a great connection and chemistry:

Reason #1
Some guys are just too immature to act straight and be honest with a woman or their dates. Some men are plain foolish and want to boost their egos and self-esteem by flirting with you; even they don’t have any plans to call you in future. But, they get your number anyway to feel good about themselves. Sometimes, they collect numbers from many girls, just in case; they feel the urge to call you in the future. Men, also think getting a woman’s phone number is like a trophy to them, so that they can feel good about themselves by showing it to their other immature friends or other men. All these unrelated and useless activities have nothing to do with you. If you’ve dated a person like it, thank yourself that he didn’t call you. You don’t want to date him anyway.

Reason #2
Sometimes, men think that asking for your number after a nice date is a ‘polite’ thing to do, even though they don’t have any plans to call you. Remember, most guys will end a date with a positive vibe or a note, and asking for your number is a part of it. Think of it in another way, as a woman, you most likely gave a man your number, when he asked for it, despite you know very well he won’t call you. But, you did it anyway, just to be polite. The man might have been a great match, but he’s not right for you.

Reason #3
This one won’t come up in your mind. Maybe he didn’t call you because he lost your number and simply forgot to call you. Or he was busy with work or went on a business trip, so he hasn’t had time to call. This simple explanation won’t come into your mind as you’re anxious and stressed out over the fact that he didn’t call you. Consider the possibility, at least. If you instantly assume the worse, it doesn’t take you to an emotionally good place.

The bottom line is it’s sad that your date didn’t call you, even after he or she said they would. You feel angry and sad because it has something to do with your feelings. But, none of it has anything to do when it comes with your worth as a person, or there is something wrong with you. The best approach for you here is to forget the past and go ahead and find someone new who is genuinely interested in calling you and being in a relationship with you.


Is It A Good Idea To Settle For “Mr. or Ms. Good Enough”?

Is it realistic for you to lower your standards and settle for “Mr. or Ms. Good Enough”? Mr. /Ms. Good Enough is looking pretty great when you see most of your friends getting married and settling down, and you’re still single. If you’ve been on dates for some time and still aren’t in a relationship, it’s natural to have thoughts like maybe you’re too picky or have very high standards’. However, our opinion is that when it comes to relationships, settling for someone who is Good Enough is a disaster waiting to happen.

Before you lower your expectations for the sake of finding a girlfriend or a boyfriend, consider these thoughts first:

1. Maintaining high standards doesn’t mean that you’re looking out for Mr. or Ms. Perfect. We understand that you want to meet the best guy or woman, but no person on Earth will meet all of your desired qualities in your checklist. The key here is to be sure about what kind of man or woman you want to be with, love, enjoy, grow with, and cherish over the years. It’s about deciding which characteristics in a person you can live with and which you can’t.

2. Conceding one or more items from your ten must-haves and ten can’t-haves list is a terrible idea. Your criteria for finding the perfect partner are highly personal, and all the qualities that you’ve listed should be guarded and honored. One thing to note here is you may not be very important for the other person. Some folks can be happy if their boyfriends or girlfriends are less ambitious than them. But, for some people, this trait can be big deal-breaker. Conceding on quality or behavior that is directly related to your existing must-haves and can’t-haves can be detrimental to the stability of your relationship in the long-term.

3. Wise single men and women don’t compromise on the major issues but compromise about the small ones. When you’ve decided that you won’t compromise on your core ten must-haves and ten can’t-haves, you can allow yourself more flexibility on other items. A great thing about love and relationships is discovering qualities, tastes and behaviors that are different from what you’re used to. You may find something that didn’t attract you then, but you’re interested in it now. Which dismissing the most important qualities from a potential partner, be open and flexible about all the other things you new love interest brings.

So, does your new love interest have all of your ten must-haves, and free from your can’t haves? If you want to find a girlfriend or boyfriend, who is a great match for you and makes you happy – you should know exactly what you want and don’t want in a partner. Your checklist doesn’t have to outrageously long or complicated. Make it simple such as top ten must have qualities and top ten negative qualities. If you’re clear about these characteristics, you’ll become a wise dater, and have more clarity and confidence is pursuing a man or woman, who is worth pursuing to be in a long-term relationship.


How To Talk About The Future Of Your Relationship?

A relationship is not a product which we can buy by bargaining. It is the conjunction of two human beings forever. If you have a partner you don’t want to lose you have to be careful of him or her. But it is not that you need won't ask anything to your partner. So know about how you talk about the future in the relationship. There are some ways you can perfectly start a conversation about your relationship with your partner:

Why you or your partner want to start a discussion is probably both of you want to know about each other, or you have some questions relating your partner. There are many points may to discuss in a relationship likes- Do you want to get married? Do you want to have kids? How many kids do you want? Who will be liable for financial matter? Your partner is not your enemy he or she is your most beloved person. So when starting a conversation, take care of your partner as follow:

1. By taking care of your partner. If both of you are going to have a serious discussion about the future of your relationship, just put your phones away. It is a decent thing you could do for your partner just like when you are working. It’s best not to get distracted. It shows your partner that you care him/her and you are serious too.

2. By listening than talking. Listen to what your boyfriend or girlfriend is saying because you want to know your partner deeply. As a good listener, you can discover a particular problem that your partner is having. If you have any worries or concerns, you clear them up the right way. You will understand your partner from active listening.

3. Don’t feel hurt by what your partner is saying. When you are talking about the future in a relationship, sometimes it doesn’t go the way you want. So you must have preparation for that. When you are listening, don't start bargaining if you hear something that you don't like. Remember that it's hard for someone to be completely vulnerable in this situation. Keep your facial expressions as loud as your words. To understand a person you need a lot more intellectual and emotional work than judgment does.

4. Be completely honest. Be entirely honest while having a conversation with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Speak your truth with clarity, love, and gentleness. If you dodge the truth out of fear of how it will be received, you are only building bigger walls in your relationship. The more you are honest, the healthier your relationship tends to be. You will see very positive changes in your relationship.

5. Know more if there’s still confusion. Don't be afraid of asking questions. If you are still concerned about a previous statement or matter, repeat what he/she said and ask him/her to elaborate so you can get a clear understanding.

6. Don't think it's too late. If you're scared to speak up, then you hurting your relationship as well as hurting yourself. Take the time to think what you want to talk in a casual conversation. When couples consistently disagree with each other, they run the risk of never having the chance to resolve the underlying dispute.

When you’re dating someone or in a relationship, we aren’t saying that it is easy to talk about the future, but it's important to be in the same boat with your partner. Take a moment to gather all your thoughts, and dive right in. Not only be honest buy also be romantic, but this will also be appreciated!


6 Things You Should Never Say to your Ex

Don’t you think it’s normal to do irrational activities after a painful breakup? Though the answer is yes, it can end up in something worse. Showing your desperation to get your ex back can attack your self-esteem.

The person who loved you yesterday might start hating you after seeing your unusual activities after the breakup. It seems romantic when someone puts an effort in saving the relationship, but nobody appreciates exaggeration. Here are 6 things you should never say to your ex for the sake of holding you self-esteem:

1. I’ve Changed Myself For You
Actions do a lot more than your words. Thus, when you brag about your improvement, there is a higher chance that your ex will dislike it. You better prove yourself a strong personal rather than convincing them to believe it.

2. I Will Do Anything To Get You Back
Presenting yourself like this will actually lower your self-esteem since your ex may think that you’re making it up just to get them back. It’s not attractive as well. They expected your full dedication, but you didn’t. You can’t ask for it not when they’ve decided to move on!

3. Please, Forgive Me!
Begging to forgive you or think about the settlement does not make your ex want you back rather it shows your lack of confidence in going on with life without them. It eventually breeds hatred in their mind since a confident man or woman never begs for other’s company since they need nobody to live a regular life.

4. I Can’t Live Without You
This dialogue is entirely obsolete these days. There were days in the past when people used to be impressed by these words, but our generation is quite smarter than them. By saying, you cannot live without them is meaningless to them. The only thing that can impress your ex is the true efforts that you’re making to cling to them.

5. Leaving Me Will Be The Biggest Mistake Of Your Life!
Threatening your loved one by telling them that they’re making a great mistake exposes your cheap mentality. If you think you are someone valuable for them, be that person first! Improve your appearance, develop a great attitude, and run for excellence. If your ex finds out that you’re trying heart and soul to impress her, she will automatically feel that losing you will be a great mistake!

6. I Have Few Things To Ask You
Both of you remain in an emotional rollercoaster, and the mental condition stays in a highly unstable state after a breakup. It is the time when your partner probably needs some space. They would prefer spending time alone to tolerating any nuisances. So, triggering them with a bunch of questions will end up in their annoyance and hatred towards you.

When you decide to live with self-esteem, your personality becomes attractive to your loved one. So, stop telling these unwanted things to them and focus on letting them feel your honest intention. It can win their hearts more easily!


When is a Good Time To Talk About The Future Of Your Relationship?

When you have any concern or points to ask your partner, or you just want to have in-depth discussions about the future of your relationship, choosing the right timing is an important issue. Most men and women tend to rush in these matters, and sometimes the outcome isn't according to expectations. Here's how you can do it:

1. When To Bring It Up
The first date is the knowing-each-other-phase of any relationship. Your career is a good topic for a first date. If you hate your job or want to get a promotion, keep it to yourself on the first few dates. Rather than complaining about your boss, talk about where you hope your career will go in the future or jump into other topics outside the office. Another sensitive area for some people is discussing on money issues. You can consider discussing your financial condition so that it doesn’t create any concern.

2. Let The Points Come Naturally
There’s no magic timeline for talking on the serious issues with your partner. We can’t tell you to wait months after month. You can fix an “XYZ” date to start a discussion. Listening to your instincts is important. This is not that you have to ask all questions or issues within one day or two. There are some issues you can raise early. For example, if you’re a middle-aged woman and want kids, then you may not want to spend time developing a relationship only to know he’s not interested in raising a family. So, in this case, some issues may need to come up earlier. If you hear that he or she came from a big family, you might ask something like, “Do you enjoy being in a big family? The typical conversation you start, the less pressure your partner will feel.

3. Don’t Make The Conversation Too Heavy
While asking your questions, avoid making things feel too serious. It’s not that the query has to remain ultra light. In an early relationship, you needn’t have a serious talk about how you’re going to save for your retirement. Instead, you can gently say that you don’t like your paycheck go toward your retirement and saving is important to you.

4. Be Honest
Love each other and tell the truth about you straight forward. Some couples lie which may drive them to a break. Why do people lie? We lie when we want to hide something from others. In a relationship when there arise a question about any object that you want to hide, just take a little time and prepare yourself, to tell the truth instead of lying.

5. Focus On Exploration And Listening Instead Of Testing And Judging
A motivational question is most advantageous when a trusting relationship is established. Focus on learning about each other instead of testing. You will both enjoy when the conversation flows in a natural manner instead of grilling each other. If you are not listening reflectively, and if you are instead imposing direction and judgment, you are impairing the relationship. What your girlfriend/boyfriend is trying to tell you about how he/she is experiencing you. Rather than argue every small detail, you should look for the truth in what your partner says to you.

It is very hard to talk about the future, when you’re dating someone or in a relationship. But, things can be made easy if get to know each other, talk honestly about all the issues in your relationship, and listening to it instead of arguing and judging each other.


How Can You Sense When Your Girlfriend Wants A Kiss

The first kiss can force anyone into a tailspin of uncertainty, fear of rejection and over-thinking. But, things levels out when you understand the secrets of kisses and your next smooch will be a lot easier to handle than the first one. Timing is the key to enjoy and cherish a great kiss. So, when is the perfect time for a first kiss? Follow these proven tips:

Tip #1
You can anticipate your girlfriend’s readiness to move forward by noticing how she responds to your casual touches, such as touching her hand in the popcorn bag, sweeping her shoulders when she wears her coat, etc. If she pulls away or feels uneasy, then slow down a little, and take some time. If she smiles, giggles or blushes, then it’s time you up your game. Put your hand over her hand while you have dinner, or hold her hand while walking her to her car, or the park. This is a relaxed approach toward getting smooched.

Tip #2
A simple way to find out how your girlfriend feels about you is to evaluate her response when you hug her. When saying hello or goodbye, keep your embrace brief, and assess her nonverbal feedback. If she presses her body against yours and keeps on hugging, take the opportunity to kiss her for the first time. If she looks a turned off, then just give that awful double pat on her back, and set her free. Maybe you should consider putting a little more effort to loosen her up and head towards romance.

Tip #3
Women expect their boyfriends to ask them before they kiss them. If you aren’t sure, and to be on the safe side, we suggest you ask her before kissing them. It might make a gentleman or a wimp; we can’t be sure about it. Remember, we’re talking about a simple display of affection here. You want to kiss her, and the exciting and sexist to way to land a kiss on her lips is to be spontaneous. If you want her to get excited, then kiss her instantly without asking her. Besides, if she isn’t into kisses or simply not in the mood, she will allow you to kiss her on the cheek. Keep her wide welcoming, and don’t act lecherous and you will see she appreciates your move.

Tip #4
The first kiss is very special for women. They love it even more when it’s positive, memorable and if it happened spontaneously. So, find a time to kiss your lady when she expects it the least. Plant your first kiss when your date might not be expecting it and guarding against it – a lip lock. Don’t try to kiss her at the end of the date as those moments are full of pressure and tension. Instead, pay close attention to her cues and try kissing her earlier in the date or don’t kiss her at all.

A kiss is an intimate and passionate part of a romantic relationship. The key is to figure out the best time to kiss her is to pay attentions to nonverbal cues and body language. If you’re dating someone new, there isn’t any written rule that you’ve to end your date with a kiss. Sometimes it’s better to wait and work up for that passionate smooch.