We all can agree on one thing: Breakups are painful. A study has found that people who recently had breakups when looking at pictures of their ex-partners have the same brain activity as those who are in physical pain. Ending a relationship with a partner is more like losing a close friend. They have known you better than anyone else; you have both shared and enjoyed wonderful feelings and emotions, and memorable experiences with them.
Now, that you are ending things with him/her makes you very upset and lost. What’s even worse is that you can no longer call that person for comfort and support if you’re going through a bad time.
No matter how gut-wrenching these breakups feel, researchers say that breakups might be easier than you think and newly single people will move on sooner than they think. This is according to Dr. Paul Eastwick, who conducted a questionnaire survey of students who are in a relationship for at least two weeks. In the survey, the participants indicated how much in love were they with their partners and how sad would they feel if they ended the relationship.
Every other week the participants would receive new questionnaires and each time they were asked if they were still with their partners. Students who broke up in the meantime had their distress levels measured in a specially designed assessment system. For example, the participants were asked how much they agreed with statements like, “I’m pretty happy these days,” and “I’m very upset that my relationship ended.”
The researchers concluded that the students who said that they were in love with their boyfriends or girlfriends at the beginning of the experiment weren’t good at predicting how distressed they would be after the breakup. But later they found that it was much easier to deal with the breakup than they thought it would be.
Many of us assume that breakups are harder on the victim, rather on the person who initiated to end things, but that’s not the case. Dr. Eastwick’s research has found that participants who decided to end the relationship also felt as bad as those who didn’t. The main difference was, the people who ended the relationship predicted their recovery time accurately, while the victims of the breakup thought they would worse off than they were. However, all of the participants agreed on one thing that the pain of the breakup will gradually reduce in time, and they were correct. All this point that it’s true that breakups are painful but recovering from this unfortunate event isn’t as hard and takes less time which most people didn’t anticipate.
The bottom line is knowing when to breakup is as important as deciding when to get involved in a relationship. There isn’t any relationship that didn’t go hard times and breaking up is just a part of the deal. After all, there is hardly any point in wasting time on something that’s won’t make us happy or feel worthy in our life.