Category Archives: Marriage

Rebuild The Trust In Your Marriage (After It’s Been Damaged)

While getting married, we always dream of spending the rest of our lives with our husbands or wives. This is also the main reason it is so painful when our partners betray our trust. Some men and women, find it so difficult to rebuild trust after it’s been damaged, they lose their desire of ever getting back in the relationship again.

But, the good news is that trust can be rebuilt. These steps will help restore trust in your relationship or marriage:

Be Patient
When you lose your confidence, regaining it is not something that will occur within a day, and it won't be easy. It becomes even harder when the atrocity committed is something that can’t be repaired. It might take a couple of days to get over a small lie, especially if the incident has not happened before. But, if it is a case of infidelity, it may take an extended period like months or years to recover. At this point, patience is the only viable to get over this incident completely. Remember, issues like these aren’t new. It has happened to many people before you. So, be patient.

Be Honest
To rebuild trust, both partners need to accept that there are problems in the relationship. You can’t fix your problem if you do not know about it. So, talk about your problems with your partner openly and honestly. Discuss all the things that lead to the problems in your relationship in the first place, and how they realized it.

Honor Your Promises
You said in your marriage vows “for better, for worse,” you both will be in it together. Well, this the worse part of it. You pledged during in your wedding you will stay with your partner through all the good and hard times, and never to quit. You might feel that you partner has not done well to honor their part, and didn’t trust you like you did to them. But, no good or anything productive will result from it, if you don’t let go or forgive the wrong your spouse has done.

Stop Blaming Each Other
It is very common for people to hold on to their pains that you’ve caused them. People find it easy to bring such things up when there is an argument or misunderstanding with their partners. Whenever you do that, it brings nothing, but bad memories, and it will not help you with the healing process. So, stop blaming each other, strive hard to forgive, even if it is too hard for you to forget all the pain, sadness and anger your spouse caused you. Remember, forgiveness is the ultimate weapon in rebuilding trust.

Confess What You Have Done and Acknowledge Your Mistakes
When you deny what you have done, it will just prompt more doubt, so you have to be truthful and be willing to be responsible for what you have done. Sometimes, revealing the whole truth in might intensify the pain and agony, but it may also affect the healing process. Also, it’s imperative to admit your faults and stop giving excuses, explanations or justifications for your conduct.

If you’re married or in a relationship and have been betrayed by your partner, these above steps can help you build your trust in your relationship. Give your girlfriend or boyfriend a second chance, trust them again, so they can realize their mistakes, and make the relationship even stronger and happier than ever before.

How To Make Your Marriage Lаѕt A Life Time

Mаrrіаgе is a рrоmіѕе that meant to lаѕt eternally, a long-term рlеdgе tо саrе for and stands by уоur раrtnеr in the good and the bad times. It is through the rough times that see the value of the соmmіtmеnt that you made while sharing your wedding vows. In these times, уоu аrе ѕuрроѕеd to dо уоur best to mаkе уоur mаrrіаgе lаѕt. The situation might arise when you will have to ѕtор relying on рrоmіѕеѕ and fully devoted to уоur spouse.

Cоmmunісаtіоn is the Key
Oреn аnd hоnеѕt communication іѕ kеy in dеvеlоріng emotional іntіmасу and lаѕtіng bonоf truѕt аnd love, no matter at what stage your relationship is in. Both partners ѕhоuld аlwауѕ feel сараblе of discussing thеіr wаntѕ, needs, achievements аnd insecurities and share it with each other. After the ѕеduсtіvе аllurе оf physical іntіmасу has diminished, this level оf еmоtіоnаl dерth wіll еnѕurе that the rеlаtіоnѕhір continues to be as romantic аnd раѕѕіоnаtе as it has аlwауѕ bееn.

Learn To Compromise
Flеxіbіlіtу іѕ very crucial whеn dеvеlоріng a good and rеwаrdіng lоng-tеrm rеlаtіоnѕhір. In оrdеr tо ensure thаt a rеlаtіоnѕhір іѕ сараblе of ѕuссеѕѕfullу weathering thе up's аnd down's оf lіfе, both individuals should be wіllіng tо compromise on issues that are important to their partners. This will eliminate the likelihood of you and your partner getting in intense arguments and fights. Besides, іt will ѕеrvе аѕ a ѕtrоng іndісаtоr thаt both іndіvіduаlѕ аrе sensitive tо particular іntеrеѕtѕ of thеіr partners.

It Is Impossible To Attain Perfection
Perfect relationships are fantasies that are only found in movies. If you keep looking for that “perfect” relationship, be prepared to be disappointed. One way to enjoy the rewards of a gеnuіnеlу lоvіng relationship is by discovering the unique qualities of your partner that will make you feeling blіѕѕful аnd happy. Sure, some of these traits will not the definition of a “perfect” partner, but if you ореn уоur hеаrt аnd mіnd tо your раrtnеr, уоu might fіnd ѕоmеthіng that’s more important and rare than perfection – love.

Respect Makes Everything Right
Many mаtсhmаkеrѕ think thаt ѕіnglеѕ lооkіng for nеw partners ѕhоuld always рurѕuе rоmаntіс interests who have a lot of common interests in each other. Althоugh thіѕ does not mean that men аnd women ѕhоuld make instant judgmеntѕ аbоut ѕоmеоnе'ѕ wоrth, іt dоеѕ іmрlу that successful and long-term rеlаtіоnѕhірѕ аrе only possible if it’s based on соmmоn іntеrеѕtѕ аnd gоаlѕ. If уоu саn find someone whо ѕhаrеѕ your personal аnd professional аѕріrаtіоnѕ, it’s highly likely that you will remain happy and satisfied as the relationship matures over time. Also, couples who are appreciative and respectful to each other are also more likely to stay long-lаѕtіng rеlаtіоnѕhір or mаrrіаgе.

Ѕроntаnеоuѕ Іntіmасу Can Do Wonders
Intіmасу іѕn’t only рhуѕісаl experience, but іt’s also can be an emotional аnd рѕусhоlоgісаl experience. Sex is important in any relationship, and don't рut too muсh рrеѕѕurе on thе rеlаtіоnѕhір by expecting іt tо be аlwауѕ аѕ “great” or “wild,” as it liked to be during the initial phase of the relationship. You can spice up your sex life by imagining your fantasies or being sроntаnеоuѕ, like having a “quickie” in your car or a secluded area. Whatever you do, make sure your partner is comfortable with it, not just you.

What Causes Pre-Wedding Fights?

Being engaged is always an excellent experience. But as no relationships are immune to fights, there is a chance that you and your partner may get into a pre-wedding fight. But, don’t get startled as it is common at this phase of the relationship. Here are the eight main reasons of pre-wedding fights:

1. Wedding Budget
It's not quite surprising that money is number one problem when it comes to pre-wedding fights. The difference of opinion regarding how to spend your wedding budget often sparks to pre-wedding fight. The way your fiancé spends your dollars might not make sense to you. For example, you may want to keep aside a bulk amount from your budget for a fantastic honeymoon, while you are planning a grand reception and want to put a significant amount for the big day.

2. Your Partner Isn’t As Enthusiastic
Spending a lot of your time in planning the big day, but your partner seems to be indifferent? He might not show any interest in wedding related discussion. It might appear to you that he does care enough or care at all about the biggest event of your life, which is quite disappointing for you. Thus the lack of enthusiasm often leads to a pre-wedding fight between couples.

3. You’re Making All The Plans
It often happens that you are doing to all the pre-wedding arrangement and your partner is busy with her wedding dress. The lack of participation in marriage arrangements can become an issue when it creates some misunderstanding between the couples.

4. The Quest List
The guest list of your wedding can also be a problem. You may want to be surrounded by all of your family and friends on this big day. But your fiancé is thinking about the effects of your guest list on his budget and venue choice. It may be that he just don’t like the program to be as crowdie as a public event and wants only close friends and family on the day.

5. What About My Family And Friends?
The most couples drag themselves in a fight before the wedding on issues regarding family. One may think that his fiancé is giving more priority to his family’s decision over her choice. Or your partner may not feel comfortable with how you deal with his family before the wedding and feel you don’t care about his family tradition.

6. We Are Spending Less Time Together
If you have not spent much time together since you are engaged, it can cause a pre-wedding fight too. Your partner might think that you do not enjoy spending times together. If you have not had any outing or dine out recently or forget to present her a beautiful gift on her birthday, it may create distance between you. Spending more time together is the best approach here in this situation.

7. I Love My Traditions
Differences often emerge between couples regarding traditions, values, customs or religion. Especially if you don’t belong to the same ethnic or social background that you do these issues may become crucial. The may be cases when you feel that your partner is not making an effort to understand your tradition.

8. Your Ex or Old Friend
An old friend or your ex can be problematic in a new relationship. If your girlfriend or boyfriend is maintaining a good relationship with the ex, you guys are most likely to encounter a pre-wedding fight.

When you and your partner have decided to get married after being in a relationship for a while, pre-wedding fights are unexpected, but they can be avoided. It is entirely understandable that you will not agree with everything, but you should agree to disagree. Conflicts in relationships are inevitable, but fighting? That is a choice!

Long Distance Relationship Gift Ideas For The One You Love

Long distance relationships are never easy . They can make you frustrated and annoyed. Sometimes you miss your loved one so badly that all you want is a hug from them.

Missing your partner who is far away from you and conveying it by sending a gift is a unique way to express your deep love. It shows that how desperately he or she is being missed. So let us find out various sweet and fun long distance gifts that can make your partner’s day a happier one.

Long Distances Care Packages

Sending a long distance care package depicts your true love and care for your lover. It is the sweetest way to convey your affection. Here I am sharing care packages ideas that will help in preparing a care package for your partner:

  • Surprise your partner with a crunchy and delicious bakery food basket. Girls who love baking will definitely love this idea. So, prepare a care package full of chocolate brownies, heart shaped cookies and tasty cupcakes for your significant one.
  • How about making a themed blue box or pink box for your partner? Just take a box and color blue or pink. Fill it with candies and chocolates wrapped all in blue or pink. You can add a picture of yours too. Attach a little message to it which says “miss you” Awwww! Isn’t it going to be so cute?
  • Nothing could be as cute as by dumping a pack of Hershey kisses chocolates in a basket along with a note saying “sending you a kiss a day.”
  • Why not having a complete movie care package prepared for your partner? Take a box and fill it with packets of popcorns, chips, candies, chocolates and most importantly a pack of CDs which includes their favorite all time movies.

Open with ….. Letter ideas

“Open with letter idea” is the cutest of all. Write letters for your lover. Express your love and your feelings in different ways in all the letters. Then take a box and place all the letters inside. Wrap them with a classy wrapping sheet, a red ribbon and send it to your lover. Read the following points to get open with letter ideas:

  • Open it when you are missing me

In this letter tell your mate how much he/she is being missed. Recall old memories of the time spent together. You can add a photo of you two together as well.

  • Open it when you are mad

This idea worked wonders when you two had a fight. In this letter just say your heart out. Express your deep love and tell that you never want to hurt their feelings or upset them.

  • Open it when it is the first day of winters

How about preparing a box for the gift along with the letter? Get a pair of gloves, a scarf or a coffee mug. Write a cute romantic letter and dispatch it along with the gift box. And yes! Don’t forget to place a picture of you two standing with a snowman in the box, if you have any.

There are numerous ideas which I haven’t listed here. Think about more fun ideas but remember that the idea should be something creative, fun and affectionate.

6 Ways to Stop Your Husband from Cheating On You

When it comes to relationships, cheating is one of the most unfortunate things to happen to a couple. We all live and work in a connected world and some men and women might unknowingly get involved in an affair. Infidelities are disastrous for relationships, so you should take steps go to prevent your partner from cheating on your in the first place. Here are six ways you can stop your boyfriend or husband from cheating on you:

1. Stop nagging. If you want your husband to be happy than the first step you can take is to reduce the amount of nagging. Make a list of all the irritating and annoying things your partner does or the ones you constantly nag him. Now, try to shorten your nagging list to half.

2. Don’t nag him about eating healthy or suggesting him to diet. Let your partner eat what he likes to eat. If you want your partner to eat healthy, try eating healthy yourself. He will then change his diet to follow you and make you happy. Besides, make an effort to cook all of his favorite recipes and dishes at home. It will compel him to come home and enjoying eating and spending time with you. A man’s love for food is primal. So, if you want to keep your man happy, then keep well fed!

3. Try to make your husband spend time with happily married couples. It can be a good influence on your partner’s behavior and will remind him that it better to be happily married rather than being single, alone and miserable.

4. If you’ve kids, don’t allow their problems to come between you and the happiness of your marriage. Remind yourself that your children will eventually grow up, and leave home. But, you’ll have to spend the rest of your life with your husband. Don’t get overwhelmed by problems that aren’t serious. Usually, couples fight about the kind and the amount of punishment their kids should get when they do something wrong. Don’t make it a big deal as long as your children are getting punished.

5. Make time for your husband. This is one of the most important to do to keep the sparks in your relationship flying if you are married for a while. Listen to him when he talks, even if you aren’t interested, tired or bored. One of the big reasons men cheat on their partners is because they’ve failed to get attention at home and their emotional needs weren’t met. So, they try to get outside where they’re admired and loved. So, treat your partner like the way he likes to be treated and loved. If there is something that your partner has mentioned that he finds sexy or adorable to you, buy a ton of it. For example, did he say to you he really loves that new perfume? Buy it. Also, admire and support him through all the life’s problems, and he will never leave your side or think of another woman.

6. Have more sex. If you assume that your partner has a high sex drive, try the best of your abilities to satisfy his carnal needs. Don’t always wait for your man to initiate sex; try to initiate sex sometimes by yourself. This will make your partner think that you too are interested in physical intimacy. The more sex your man gets it at home, the less he will try to get it outside.

There are men and women who have been victims of infidelity although they’ve been loving and supporting to their partners. For those folks, there is little to do to keep their partner’s faithful. For the rest, this list will give people an interesting guideline to make their relationship happy and everlasting.

How Long Should You Wait To Get Engaged?

When you’re dating for a while, you probably wondered what’s taking your man taking so long to propose. Is he just patient or is he just playing you along? How long should you or they wait for it? You probably are thinking that maybe your partner isn’t proposing to you because his expectations from this relationship have changed. You’re constantly thinking how long you should wait before he pops the question to you and you’re unsure when will you bring up the topic for discussion with your partner. Your thoughts are filled with frustration and anxiety about the future of your relationship.

Well, to make things easier, ask yourself these four questions before you bring up the conversation to get engaged:

1. Are you ready to accept the relationship as it is, or give up thinking about marriage? Most women like to get married because it’s validated by society and you need to get married to have kids. But, you don’t need to get engaged to be happy and have children. Many couples are now living together as an alternative to tying the knot. Whether you can have a long-lasting marriage or not before living together, the research results are mixed.

2. Are you ready and strong enough to demand from your partner what you wish for? Are you willing to leave the relationship and accept the consequences once your partner failed to honor your ultimatum? If you issued a deadline to your partner regarding the engagement, it would rarely motivate him to do so. And if you keep pressuring him for marriage, it will keep him away from proposing in the first place. Couples, who had conflicts before getting engaged, will have problems in their relationships after getting married. So, if you think that some of these issues need to be addressed, resolve them before getting engaged.

3. Are there any issues in your relationship that is holding your partner to have the discussion with you? Do you think these matters need to addressed, accepted or rejected? Are there any problems with the timing? If your spouse or both of you, are in college or just graduated and looking for a stable job, or not financially stable, it’s okay for you both not to think about getting engaged or married. But, it’s not acceptable for someone who is in his 30s, with a stable job and in a relationship for a few years.

4. Lastly, can you wait? It might be that your partner has a plan of his own and saving up. As you know by now, getting engaged in one of the biggest life decisions one can make and no one should rush it. Sometimes the eagerness to get engaged is so intense among women that they would do and dismiss things that don't relate with their rationale or consciousness. Having a conversation on this subject might bring up problems in your relationship that you always hoped to avoid.

If you’re in a relationship or dating someone for a while, it’s natural for you to get engaged and eventually get married with your significant other. But, before you take the initial steps to get married, you should ask yourself these questions and find the right answers. If you do this, the bringing up this topic and discussing it with your partner won’t be a problem.

Can a Healthy Marriage Survive Without Sex?

It’s even harder to sustain a marriage than a relationship. One of the biggest reasons most men and women face in their marriages is that couple says that the thrill and spark aren't there anymore. They aren’t excited as they were during the early days of the relationship.

Couples say they tried everything they can to reignite the romance in their marriage, including going to relationship experts and therapists. Some find success to save their marriage, while some become so frustrated they get divorced. Coping with a breakup or a divorce is hard, and some men and women never get over their past relationships and move on. They don’t try to date anymore and get involved in new relationships. They become disappointed, depressed and hopeless about their lives.

Sex is one main reason for the demise of marriages and relationships. As the relationship matures over time, couples don’t feel attracted to their partners like before. They don’t feel the sparks anymore. So, is possible for a couple to stay together when the thrill is gone?

Though experts believe that sex is important to keep the couples together, it is also possible to maintain a long-lasting relationship without sex. Marriage and family therapist Dr. Paul Hokemeyer says that as couples mature sex becomes overhyped and overrated. He says real and lasting happiness and pleasure can only come from a deep and genuine emotional connection with another person. When sex becomes irregular in a relationship then the only way to keep it healthy is through trust, respect, laughter and vulnerability between the spouses. In fact, in a mature relationship, emotional connection is more vital than physical intimacy.

While sexual intensity and intimacy may keep the relationship alive at the beginning, it needs to complement with emotional intimacy over time. To give a perspective on the subject, people who are indulging in casual sex may have great sex and enjoy their time without being emotional close to their dates. But, eventually, they will feel empty and lonely, which they won’t have if they were in an emotionally satisfying relationship that doesn’t have sex.

However, sexless relationships or infrequent sex in new relationships might have problems. Sex nurtures the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of a relationship. If a situation arises like if one partner in a relationship is enjoying sex more than the other, then detrimental feelings can appear between the partner such as sadness, anger, and resentment. The key to making sexless marriage or relationship function is communication. Both partners must be okay with it. If both partners believe that their togetherness and shared values are more important than having physical intimacy, then the relationship can survive and can even thrive.

If couples can redefine the importance of sex, sexual intimacy and emotional connection among themselves, then a relationship can overcome sexual challenges. The emotional intimacy and bond between the partners can also strengthen in the process. If intimacy and trust have been established between without sexually satisfying either partner, it’s possible to have a healthy and happy relationship without sex.

Living Together Before Marriage – A Relationship Killer or Not?

Many factors can create problems in a relationship. Some of the common and obvious reasons are infidelity, lack of communication, lack of commitment and trust, constant fighting and arguing and so on. Some relationships and marriages end because both partners are unhappy, started to resent each other, simply one of the partner’s can’t meet the physical, mental and emotional desired of the other partner.

Now, there’s another reason that can make or break a relationship. It’s living together at the same place before marriage. It’s quite normal for men and women who have in an exclusive relationship for some time to move in with either partner and find a new place for themselves. We all know the benefits of living together. It’s a great opportunity to save money on rent, utilities, spending less time to work and other places back and forth, and best of all, the ability to spend more quality time together with your significant other. You can also see this living together arrangement as the ultimate test of the relationship. While cohabiting, if you can get habituated of living under the same roof and work together as a couple, you might be more confident to believe that you’ve found the right person you always wanted to marry.

Researchers have been studying this exact idea for quite some time now. They tried to figure out if living together before getting married, without any commitment, makes it easier to break up or get divorced. Many studies have analyzed the impacts of living together before marriage and results aren’t very encouraging. They have found the cohabiting before marriage consequently leads to unhappy marriage and increased level distress in marriages. However, there has been a new study that reports that living together before marriage isn’t necessarily the determining factor whether the marriage will succeed or not. For women, marital distress was more likely to happen when there wasn’t a commitment to marriage in first place. It includes being engaged or more realistic plans toward getting engaged and ultimately getting married. But, for men things were a little unusual. For men, marital stability had no significant impact regardless if men were committed to marriage before living together.

So, what have we learned from this? Is your plan on saving on rent and spending more time together by living together with your partner before getting married not viable in the long-run? Well, if you want to prevent your relationship or marriage from going south, we would suggest that you and your partner seriously consider committing first before living together. Although recent studies show that men won’t experience divorces or their relationships end, women are different.

Regardless, you’re dating someone new or trying to get back with your ex, every man and woman, who are in relationships, hope that their relationship will ultimately result in happy, lasting marriage. But, there are two parties when it comes to relationships or marriages, and it’s crucial that you take into consideration of committing to your partner before living together, as it may affect both of you in the long-term when you get married.

The Three Stages to Every Relationship

In movies and television romantic relationships always have a happy ending or a scene where the couple lives happily ever after. But, in reality, not so much. There are many stages a relationship passes through over time, but most of us want a loving and long-lasting relationship in the end. Many men and women think relationships are easy, but it’s not. Mature, committed, and lasting relationships need work, and both partners have to chime in equally.

Anyways, when it comes to romantic relationships, there are three stages. These stages will help you to indicate which phase of development your present relationship is.

Romantic Love

People idealize their potential partners at this phase. You feel joy, compassion, and excitement with your spouse. This feeling makes you think about your partner all day and night. You visualize all the fun and interesting things you would like to with your newly found romantic interest. You always want to spend all of your time with your partner. However, there is something you need to remember. In this stage of romance, you don’t tend to think about the flaws of your partner. You only focus on their good sides when you’re with him or her. Your brain gets addicted to the happy feelings of being in love. This is romantic love, and the media is obsessed by it. But, it’s not true love or a living relationship for that matter. And buying into this will only create disappointments in real relationships.

Realistic Love

This is where the second phase of romantic relationships begins, which is realistic love. This is the stage where most couples get a taste of what a real relationship feels like and it’s only the stage where most couples get stuck. The novelty of romantic love wears off, and people start to realize the real personalities of their partners. The flaws get exposed, and some couple begins to resent each other. It’s here the relationship reaches its defining moment. It is at this phase where couple either make or end their relationships. Some do it instantly, while others keep on bickering and resenting their partners until they can no longer take it anymore. Some men and women get scared and insecure, so they settle with their partners, even after knowing that they aren’t compatible with each other. You start to feel cheated, and you beat yourself up for settling with a person you don’t love. You feel hurt, desperate, upset and keep blaming your partner for not meeting your needs.

Mature Love

This the final stage in the romantic relationship. Both people feel cared and fulfilled for each other, and they feel safe and secure in the relationship. The love is mature and mutual. At this stage, both partners know each other at a fundamental and emotional level. They accept each other’s flaws and perfections, and both try to bring the best of themselves. The only way couple can obtain mature love is to strive through the previous stages of love.

We all make mistakes. Every stage of love is riddled with mistakes. The important thing is both partners should commit themselves to the relationship, navigate through all the flaws, and make the relationship safe and secure.

How Can We Rejuvenate Our Emotional State?

We are humans and all of us get tired at some point. Excessive physical energy can exhaust our body, and you may need some rest to get back to normal. Same is the case with our emotions; there comes a time when life has been just a little too much and your mind can’t take the pressure. The reasons could be many – there may be issues with your love life, with your family, issues at work or just a general burden that has gotten too hard for you. Sometimes, you are not doing enough for yourself which is why you will face that emotional irritation. Being a perfectionist can emotionally drain you as well. You are always tied up in perfecting things, and it takes up a great deal of your mental and physical strength. Whatever the case may be, it is important that you give your emotional state a boost to feel refreshed again. This article is going to tell you how you can pull yourself out from that emotional mess.

#1 Identify the source

Before you start with any other thing, it is important that you see what fits your situation and what exactly it is that is making you emotionally upset. Once you know what the source is, you can further take steps to change it.

#2 Communicate with your loved ones

If the problem is with any one of your relationships, then you need to put aside your ego and talk to that person. It may the first time that you are doing this but this one time effort might just save you from the trouble happening in your life. There is a reason you love them, and if you feel like something is not right, then they have the right to know it because ignoring it will only make it worse.

#3 Put your own self first

You need to put yourself first and see what it is that makes you happy. You need to invest some time in yourself and put your dreams and desires ahead of other responsibilities in life. When you are not happy yourself, then you will not be able to do anything right anywhere else. It is your life, and you need to take care of yourself the most.

#4 Change what you can

You need to see what you can change and what you cannot. You cannot change what other people think or say, but you can definitely bring changes in your life and the environment around you. You can improve the environment by making it positive, surrounding yourself with the people who love you and by getting rid of all the negative vibes in your life.

#5 Find your strength

Nothing will ever be possible unless you believe in yourself and believe that you can do it. We all have our boundaries, and some have financial issues while some face social problems. You need to rise above the barriers and break them to be able to bring out the strength in you. We have the power to change, but we need to know just how to do it.