Let’s start by saying that communication and compromise are the two most essential and unavoidable elements in any relationship. These two items should be at the core of the foundation for a fruitful and loving relationship. But there’s a big difference between compromising yourself to make your significant other love you more and fully changing yourself into someone else all together.
When you’re dating or in a relationship, we all have to compromise at times such as missing your favorite game to meet up with your sister, or spending time with your girlfriend instead of hanging out at the bar with your childhood friends. We all sometimes, give up your preferences for those you love and care about. It’s also the same when it comes to romantic relationships, but there must be a balance. But what happens when a simple compromise negatively affects who you are and what makes you – YOU?
We find other people interesting because they’re different. Your uniqueness is what makes you fun and exciting. And while looking for a girlfriend, this is exactly what a lot of men are looking for. They want to date someone who will challenge them and encourage them to get out from their comfort zones and do something beyond their everyday tasks. In a healthy, committed relationship, every man and woman should be and feel open to explore the interests of their partners. It shows their real devotion to that person, and actively demonstrating that you love and care for them. It means reading her favorite book, cooking her favorite food, or going to a concert or a restaurant of her choice, and just doing all the usual things in life together.
If you realize that your significant other isn’t fully supportive of your own hobbies or interests; take it as a big red flag in your relationship. Sure, she might not like photography or shopping as much as you do, but if she genuinely loves you, she’ll support those passions, regardless. She understands that these passions are what give you life, makes you feel alive and happy. So, she won’t take it away from you, nor will she make any attempts to change them.
Pause for a few moments and think how much you’ve changed for her compared to what she’s sacrificed for you. Do believe that you’ve compromised more than her? If yes, get out and fast. Your love interest should be falling in love with you. You shouldn’t turn into someone that she wants you to be. In situations like these, it's easy to make up excuses and say things like she would come hiking with me, or that’s really not her thing, but she didn’t spend time with you over the weekend.
Of course, there might be some very legitimate reasons like she was busy working that weekend or was visiting her parents. Nonetheless, it’s up to you to determine where things are crossing the line too often. For instance, if you dislike spicy food, don't force yourself eating it on the weekends just because your girlfriend enjoys eating it or is her favorite food. If you feel uncomfortable hanging out with her girlfriends in a bar or club setting, don't feel pressured to be there. These are some examples, but you get the idea.
In dating and relationships, not every love is meant to be. If your girlfriend doesn’t desire you the way you are and in entirety, let her go. She wasn’t yours anyway.