Let’s get one thing straight; no one wants to get married to someone beneath them. Don’t get me wrong; we are talking particularly talking about wealth, education social class, or family status. We are referring to the whole package. This entire package also consists all of the qualities a man or a woman brings to a relationship. We want to have relationships, and possibility gets married to someone who is compatible or matches with each other regarding earning potential, character or personality. Sometimes relationships end because the two people weren’t equal or compatible with each other.
Consider these thoughts as you ponder possible matches and mismatches of your own:
1. Accept the traditional principle of relationships. When you’re looking for someone, you expect to find or attract someone whose total set of attributes is almost equal to your own. This is the traditional principle of relationships. It’s mostly like a business contract. You want to find the best person, but making this best person your boyfriend or girlfriend mostly depends on what you bring in trade. Some folks won’t be very fond of it, calling in calculating and boorish. But, love it or hate it, when it comes to choosing a partner, all of us wants to get a ‘good deal’. In romantic perspective, it refers to the person who can bring as much as good qualities to the relationship as you do.
2. Evaluate your assets. Assess carefully what you can bring in a potential relationship. Keep in mind not to inflate your ego by listing all or exaggerating all of your good qualities. Also, don’t deflate your ego or undermine yourself by showcasing your shortcomings. Your primary goal should be to accurately and honestly understand what exactly you want to offer to the other person.
3. Assess your boyfriend/girlfriend’s attributes. There will always be men and women who will be highly intelligent, athletically gifted, good-looking or spiritually thoughtful. Then there are folks who have a moderate set of skills, while some people have significantly fewer qualities than most people. Therefore, hone your skills so that you can easily pinpoint the strengths and weaknesses in the opposite sex.
4. Recognize that all people possess a wide variety of positive qualities. We often hear people assigning a number to men and women such as, ‘He’s a 5, or she’s a 9’. What they’re doing is that they’re rating these men and women based on their looks. This is rather unfortunate as we are yet to come across a rating system where men and women will be rated on their numerous other positive qualities such as kindness, generosity, intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, and so on. Remember that physical looks are just one among many other traits to evaluate a person.
5. Look for a win-win situation. If you want to be in a committed and long-term relationship, you want to feel like a champion or winner in your choice of your boyfriend or girlfriend. The other person too should feel happy and content about choosing you. No one should even slightly think that they go ripped off while choosing their partners. After all, the most stable couples are those who have most of their interests, qualities and attributes aligned with each other.
The bottom line is when it comes to choosing someone to date or being in a long-term relationship, find someone who is not too above you or beneath you, but it just right for you.