Are you one of those men or women, who have been on many dates, yet keep falling for the sucky ones? You tell yourself that you’re great person, but keep wondering why you are still single. Here are few tips that will help to pick the right man.
Learn to Say No
The first step in the quest to find true love is to clarify what qualities you want to see in your boyfriend or girlfriend and pass on everyone who doesn’t meet those criteria. It means you should feel comfortable to say ‘no’ to guys or gals who don’t have what you need to be in a healthy and committed relationship. If you don’t, it’s highly likely that you’ll be in a relationship or relationships that aren’t right for you. The “’not-so-good” relationships will drain your positive energy and self-esteem, and doubt your judgment. At first, this may be difficult for you to do, and you’ll need to be optimistic about the future, and trust your instincts. However, it can be empowering as you’re telling yourself that you deserve the best, and won’t settle for less.
Stay Away From People Who Fear Commitment
Most commitment phobics are people who are great when it comes to intimacy but get repelled if asked about commitment. People with commitment issues can be avoided by looking for any hints at the initial stages of the relationship. Check if the person you’re dating has been in many short relationships? Does he/she talk about these issues with you? Does he/she talk about the future of the relationship with you? Once you get the answers, act fast. You might be tempted to continue dating this person, hoping that you can change him/her. Don’t do it. It won’t work as Commitmentphobics will always their behaviors and will justify their actions and decisions.
Handle the Intimacy Gap
A relationship with an unbalanced intimacy or one-sided intimacy will surely leave one partner frustrated. If your see sign of emotional gaps in the relationship, address them quickly. Work through your intimacy issues, and if both partners are willing to combine their efforts, the outcome will be incredible.
Understand The Differences Between Pseudo-Intimacy And The Real Thing
Human crave closeness and intimacy. It’s natural. A deep, satisfying connection can only be achieved gradually and with shared experiences and openness. In this modern, fast-paced and mechanized world, people have developed experiences that make us believe that it’s real intimacy. But, it’s not. True intimacy, both emotional and physical intimacy, is focused on that “special someone,” with whom we want to share a unique closeness. Pseudo-intimacy is simply a tool for own personal pleasure, sexual or emotional. Acknowledging the differences between the two is the ultimate defense in establishing an intimate relationship with someone who can, and who can’t.
Learn to Say Yes
Finding the right man or woman is the biggest challenge for many people looking for a relationship. But, for some men and women, saying “yes” to a committed relationship is the biggest hurdle. It’s because they fear rejection, they fear to be intimate, and they fear their relationship might fail. These fears will keep them from pursuing the relationships that will change and make their lives better. So, if you’re looking for loving and long-lasting relationship, and want to experience true love, confront these fears, and say “yes” to love and fear to love.