Many people who are considering to end their relationship are simply too afraid to do it because they are unsure about what the future holds for them. They also feel guilty about leaving their partners and the upset about the emotional scars that comes with breakups. But what if you can end your relationship without any fear or feeling guilty?
Here are four things to consider before you terminate your relationship without feeling remorseful and afraid:
1. You are not living in the past and fearful of a future that’s yet to exist. When you constantly worry about the future, it indicates that you are fully available in the present. It has nothing to do about fear or anything related about unexpected events to happen in the future. It’s our own thoughts that are generating these feeling of fear. We humans can bad at predicting the future, so it’s in our best interests to let go of our fears and what’s going to happen in the future. The right thing to do is to focus fully on the present.
2. You aren’t responsible how other feel, whether its happiness or sadness. If you feel upset and guilty while breaking up with somebody or ending a relationship, it’s the fear that’s telling you to you will hurt the other person. It’s a common misconception that we realize how others feel, but that’s entirely based on the concept we would experience the same feeling, in similar circumstances. The truth is our own thoughts are responsible for our feelings, not action of individuals. You can make anyone feel anything, and no one can make you feel anything too.
3. You are entirely responsible for your own peace and happiness. No one can make you feel happy or peaceful. Most people often struggle with making the right decision, continuously worried about that their own happiness, well-being, and security depends on how an individual feels. But the fact is your peace and happiness depends on your own thoughts, not on any external force or factors. Once you start to realize that, you will feel more confident to end a relationship without feeling guilty or afraid.
4. Your actions don’t define you. Most people in a relationship decide not to leave a relationship, even if they want to, because they believe that it will make them a bad person. They keep on continuing with their unhappy relationships always haunted of being labeled or criticized as uncaring, unforgiving, narcissistic or selfish. Don’t doubt yourself and just because you decided to end a relationship doesn’t define the person you really are. In fact, ending a relationship for someone who you think isn’t compatible with you is the most selfish thing one can imagine. The best possible gesture that says who you really are is setting him or her free to find a partner who really wanted to have a relationship with them, if they aren’t happy of being with you.
The takeaway here is it’s nobody is at fault here when it comes to breaking up or deciding to end a relationship. We are responsible for our own happiness here and if the existing relationship isn’t providing it, then it’s the best intention for both partners to call it quits.