Most people assume that relationships happen naturally. If you’ve met your soulmate or found the right person, then your relationship will proceed smoothly. But, unfortunately, this magical and unrealistic thinking can leave a lot of couples confused, worried, frustrated, and either settling for a relationship that’s less satisfying or isn’t right for them or breaking up.
There is some advice that might be helpful to resolve some of the issues in the relationship or marriage, but not all relationships are good. Some advice might naturally look like guidance to but they may, in fact, will harm the relationship. To help you avoid those mistakes, these are the three places that you shouldn’t look for relationship advice:
- Your Parents
Your parents have helped you get through infancy, toddlerhood, and adulthood. You tried to push them back during adolescence but you still were there for them, and they did everything they can to keep you from doing long-term damage. So, it’s natural you’ll look to them for relationship and marriage advice. There might be a possibility that your parents’ marriage might be not that health or there is a good chance that you may be a child of a divorce. This can put your marriage or relationship at a risk of failure. To be honest, many of us don’t delve too deeply into our parents’ marriages and having a conversation about the inner workings of their marriage to one or both of them isn’t a good idea.
Most of us tend to seek information including relationship advice, from social media, TV, radio or the entertainment magazines. You may have read about your favorite celebrities falling in love, and because they are rich, famous, or glamorous, you might think they must be doing it right. But, celebrities are just people like you, and they happen to be living under a microscope. So, they don’t know much about relationships and what makes a relationship work than you do. Therefore, it’s unwise to follow their examples simply because they’re public.
- Your Friends
There is a high possibility that most of the things you know about your friends’ marriages are superficial. You’ll see their Facebook or Instagram posts where they’re laughing and smiling, and say loving and cute things to each other. You’ll also see them enjoy or having fun at parties or backyard barbecues, but sometimes, what they share about their lives on social media might not match what’s actually occurring behind closed doors. You might discover about their constants arguments or the lack of sex and intimacy in their relationships. But, you somehow decide to laugh it off or ignore it because you feel uncomfortable about it or simply don’t want to get involved. It’s not uncommon to your friends complaining a lot of about their spouses while hanging out with them. It becomes much easier if you get involved in the conversation, then talk about what might actually happen and what can be done to resolve it. If you’re lucky, you might have one friend who might give some useful relationship advice. Unfortunately, they may also be ill-equipped to advise you. And if this buddy is single or divorced themselves, they can be biased towards you.