When you have any concern or points to ask your partner, or you just want to have in-depth discussions about the future of your relationship, choosing the right timing is an important issue. Most men and women tend to rush in these matters, and sometimes the outcome isn't according to expectations. Here's how you can do it:
1. When To Bring It Up
The first date is the knowing-each-other-phase of any relationship. Your career is a good topic for a first date. If you hate your job or want to get a promotion, keep it to yourself on the first few dates. Rather than complaining about your boss, talk about where you hope your career will go in the future or jump into other topics outside the office. Another sensitive area for some people is discussing on money issues. You can consider discussing your financial condition so that it doesn’t create any concern.
2. Let The Points Come Naturally
There’s no magic timeline for talking on the serious issues with your partner. We can’t tell you to wait months after month. You can fix an “XYZ” date to start a discussion. Listening to your instincts is important. This is not that you have to ask all questions or issues within one day or two. There are some issues you can raise early. For example, if you’re a middle-aged woman and want kids, then you may not want to spend time developing a relationship only to know he’s not interested in raising a family. So, in this case, some issues may need to come up earlier. If you hear that he or she came from a big family, you might ask something like, “Do you enjoy being in a big family? The typical conversation you start, the less pressure your partner will feel.
3. Don’t Make The Conversation Too Heavy
While asking your questions, avoid making things feel too serious. It’s not that the query has to remain ultra light. In an early relationship, you needn’t have a serious talk about how you’re going to save for your retirement. Instead, you can gently say that you don’t like your paycheck go toward your retirement and saving is important to you.
4. Be Honest
Love each other and tell the truth about you straight forward. Some couples lie which may drive them to a break. Why do people lie? We lie when we want to hide something from others. In a relationship when there arise a question about any object that you want to hide, just take a little time and prepare yourself, to tell the truth instead of lying.
5. Focus On Exploration And Listening Instead Of Testing And Judging
A motivational question is most advantageous when a trusting relationship is established. Focus on learning about each other instead of testing. You will both enjoy when the conversation flows in a natural manner instead of grilling each other. If you are not listening reflectively, and if you are instead imposing direction and judgment, you are impairing the relationship. What your girlfriend/boyfriend is trying to tell you about how he/she is experiencing you. Rather than argue every small detail, you should look for the truth in what your partner says to you.
It is very hard to talk about the future, when you’re dating someone or in a relationship. But, things can be made easy if get to know each other, talk honestly about all the issues in your relationship, and listening to it instead of arguing and judging each other.