Sometimes, marriage can be a roller-coaster. It’s common to hear from couples after being married for some time saying that they feel hopeless, and their whole marriage has become a mess and pointless. If you are someone who is already in this situation, it is understandable why you are feeling this way. It’s because you already know that your marriage is gradually turning into a loveless one. But it’s not all hopeless. Maybe it’s because of you that your marriage isn’t working and can’t see a way out of.
If you are really willing to save your marriage the first thing you need to do is to focus on yourself and your feelings. You need to find out what works for you, what is working both for you and your partner, analyze the situation, and then see what changes can be made. But before that, you need to get back or improve your self-esteem, self-confidence, self-worth, and strength inside of you. Only focus on all the positive things about yourself and let go of the negatives. Now that you are feeling a little better about yourself and your self-esteem and confidence is better than before, it’s time to start looking at the relationship.
- Accept her for who she is
You don’t need to like and support everything your wife. But, you need accept her exactly where she stands right now. This will give you the freedom of mind to talk and react to her in the way you think is good for you.
- Listen to understand
When your partner speaks to you, listen to what she says and try to understand. Don’t interrupt her with an answer or a question while she’s still speaking.
- Agree with her
Every person is entitled to his or her opinion. So, when your spouse says something, it’s her opinion. Don’t start an argument over it, instead agree with her opinion. But, just because you agree with her opinion doesn’t mean that it’s your opinion, and you support it. It means that you understand her. And when your wife asks for your opinion, give it. Don’t hesitate about it. Otherwise, don’t.
- Make a list of things will make your partners’ life better
If you are finding this challenging to do so, ask her and prepare a list of stuff will make yours and your partner’s life better. Also, just listing them down isn’t enough, you should make a plan for achieving at least one every week.
- Start hugging and kissing your partner again
Show affection and compassion towards your significant other. Show her that you care. Surprise her. You need to show her you want to take charge, not because you want a reaction from her. Take the lead in all of this. Don’t wait for her to do it. Show to her by your behavior and do it because you want this and you can do it.
- Prioritize time together
If you are feeling better about yourself, you can now prioritize your marriage, even before the kids, if you have any. Take some time out together. Make that alone time the most important thing in your life. Do outdoor activities together, go on a vacation together, or have a dinner date. No matter what you both do, make spending time together a priority.