No Bad Blood: Can You Really Stay Friends With An Ex?

How many times have you broken up with someone and told them, “We can still be friends?” Or maybe you've had someone say this to you. Either way, you've had to wonder: Is it really possible to stay friends with an ex? This person has been a part of your life, so it's understandable you would want them to stay in it to some extent. But does it really work to be friends with someone you once had a romantic relationship with? We're discussing the ways that staying friends with an ex could work…and the ways that it won't.

You Can Stay Friends With An Ex If…

  1. The breakup wasn't that bad.
  2. You no longer have feelings for them.

The two ways that you can stay friends with an ex is if the breakup wasn't bad and if you no longer have romantic feelings for them. If the breakup was clean and mutual, it is easier to stay friends because there is no bad blood. Both of you were ready to move on and neither of you holds any resentment towards the other. It is also easier to stay friends if the romantic feelings are gone, because this means there will be no temptation to make the relationship a romantic one again. You can just focus on building a healthy, long-lasting friendship.

You Can't Stay Friends With An Ex If…

  1. The breakup was really bad.
  2. There are still romantic feelings on either side.

Did your ex cheat on? Or maybe you cheated on them? Were they abusive or toxic? In these cases, you cannot stay friends. Why would you want to? You didn't want to be in a relationship with someone like that and you wouldn't want to be friends with them either. Also, when a relationship ends in a bad way, like in those scenarios, one or both partners hold on to resentment. This makes it nearly impossible to stay friends. Another thing that makes it impossible to stay friends with an ex is if one or both of you still has romantic feelings. This will mean that one of you will always hope that the friendship turns into a relationship again. In this case, the best thing to do is go your separate ways so that you can both move on.

friendly exes


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