One of the greatest gifts we can give to a person we love and care is to love him or her unconditionally. But what will you do when the love you’re giving isn’t appreciated by your boyfriend or girlfriend? What will you do when the love you’re giving to him or her makes you think that you’ve been taken advantage of?
When you feel that you’re being taken advantage of when it comes to loving your significant other, it’s time to take an honest look at your relationship. You should the same type of love you give to your boyfriend or girlfriend. You have the full right to ask for it and expect reciprocity from love relationships. And you can achieve this by first loving yourself unconditionally. If you feel the love within yourself, it allows you to give more love to your lover and others around you.
So, how can you do it? How can you show unconditional love to yourself? Below are five tips that will help you with it:
1. Figure out why you feel like you must earn love from others by overplaying it. An easy way to do this by looking for patterns in your past behavior when you loved people who walked out of your life without appreciating you, or even without saying a “thank you.” Look deep within of yourself and your past to locate the answers.
2. Once you find a pattern, treat it as your problem, and take steps in ending it. Start loving yourself in the same way others including your partner, loves you. You can do an act of self-love by developing small love rituals for yourself. This includes buying yourself flowers, gifts, taking a nice vacation, or enjoying your day at the spa on a regular basis.
3. Don't feel guilty. Never thought of being sorry for yourself. This will be hard at first, but no matter what stick with it. You thoroughly deserve the quality and level of love that you put out there.
4. Prepare a affirmations list and read them to yourself every day. This includes assertions such as, “All of my relationships are full of love,” “My girlfriend truly loves and values me,” “My girlfriend genuinely appreciates me,” and so on and so forth.
5. Once you reached a phase in the relationship, where you’re building yourself up, start asking what you need and deserve from your partner. After working hard all day at the office, and taking your wife or girlfriend for a dream dinner date, she’s been asking for, ask her to either wash or fold the clothes. In most cases, once you express your need in a loving way, your significant other will respond positively. If she doesn’t respond the way you expected it to be, be more firm or assertive with your partner about helping you. Still, your partner refuses to comply or give what you want, it’s pretty clear that they’ll not change their behavior and they're in the relationship only to get as much as they can from you.
When you’re dating someone or in a relationship, without unconditional love from your partners, you’ll accomplish nothing. Keep in mind, loving someone unconditionally is all about is giving love without condition and expectation. It’s the only way to gain love, praise, and respect from your romantic partners.