For most men, girls are elusive creatures and figuring out if a girl is interested seems impossible. Does she really want you? Is she just being polite? Or is she just teasing you? But girls actually give off some pretty surefire signs they are interested in you. By decoding these signs of attraction, you will be able to pick up any girl and decide which girls are worth pursuing.
Learning the Signs a Girl is Interested
The signs of attraction have actually be heavily studied by researchers. As far as animals go, it is usually the male which initiates courtship. Think of a male peacock strutting its feathers or a seal inflating its nasal pouch to attract a female. Humans are different in that it is the woman who initiates courtship. Now, you may disagree with this as men usually think they are making the first move. This is not the case. Studies show that 90% of the time, girls initiate courtship. They do this by giving out signals to the targeted man. If the man is able to pick up on these signals, then he will have a very high success rate with girls.
You can definitely approach a girl who isn’t giving out any signs of interest. However, unless you have mastered the art of picking up girls, you probably aren’t going to have much luck. Until you perfect your approach and bantering skills, you’d do best to wait for a sign of attraction and then make your move.
Signs She Is Interested – When You First Meet
Whether at a bar, in class, at a party, or even on the street, these are the signs of attraction you should look for when you first meet or make contact with a girl.
1. She Touches Herself, Hair, Scarf, or Jewelry
Self-touching is one of the most studied signs that a girl is interested in you. The mind is acting out subconsciously what it wants to be done to the body. Hair-playing is the most common one you will find but, if a girl is really attracted to you, she might even start stroking the inside of her thighs or pulling a ring on and off her finger in a seductive way.
2. She fondles her glass (or other object)
This one should be pretty obvious: if a girl is rubbing or fondling a cylindrical object, then she is trying to tell you something!
3. She stays in conversation more than 5 minutes
Girls aren’t going to waste their time talking to you if they aren’t interested. If the conversation lasts longer than 5 minutes and her eyes aren’t darting around the room looking for an escape, chances are that the girl is interested in you.
4. She leans into you
This one you can test. While talking to the girl, lean back slightly. If she is interested, she will lean in.
5. She laughs
Marilyn Monroe famously said, “If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.” It isn’t because laughter is so powerful. It is because the girl is laughing because she is interested in you.
Signs She is Interested – After You First Meet
So you got a girl’s phone number. That’s only part of the battle. Attraction can quickly fizzle out after the first meeting. Here is how you can tell whether she is still interested so you know whether it is worth it to pursue the girl.
6. Responds to your texts with more than one line
If you are getting one-word replies to your texts, then she is definitely not interested (there are some exceptions to the one word text meanings, but it is generally a bad thing). Remember, that texting is part of the game. You should use text to keep her interested and build attraction. If you constantly get numbers only to have the girl lose interest, you should read our guide to flirting over text.
7. Responds to your banter flirtatiously
Just because she responds to your texts, it doesn’t mean she is interested. If she is really interested, she will respond flirtatiously. Teasing is an especially good sign!
Signs She is Interested – While On Your Date
So you got the girl to go on a date with you. Well done! Make sure you set yourself up for success by choosing a good first date spot. To gauge how the date is going, look out for these signs she is interested.
8. She got dressed up for the date
Here’s a good tip to gauge her level of interest (and what she’s willing to do on a first date). Look for her panty line or bra strap. If she is wearing a thong, lacy bra, or other sexy lingerie, she is probably hoping that the date will end in bed, or at least with some fondling.
9. She touches you
All those times your knees touched under the table were NOT accidental! Any touching is a very strong sign of attraction.
10. She asks “when am I going to see you again”
Girls today don’t like to play games. If she is really interested in you, she isn’t going to wait around for a call from you. She will ask you straight out when she can see you again.
11. She wakes up next to you
Just because she slept with you, it doesn’t mean she is interested in you! (yeah, you read that right). Just like guys, girls sometimes get down and dirty with a guy just to let off a bit of steam through a casual fling. But then they jet in the morning. If she is still there in the morning and, better yet, sticks around for breakfast, then she is definitely interested.
Signs She is Interested – After the Date
You’ve been on a date. But, if the signals on the date weren’t clear, these post-date signs of attraction will tell whether she is really into you or just playing the field.
12. She follows up immediately after the date
If the date went really well, then you are going to have a message on your phone by the time you get home (probably something along the lines of “had a great time” or “sweet dreams”).
* It is always good practice to follow up after a date. Even if the date went badly and you don’t want to see her anymore, you should still follow up! Thank the girl, tell her you enjoyed her company, but you didn’t feel any chemistry so don’t think it would be wise to see each other again. She will respect you for your honesty – and the bad date won’t come back to bite you in the ass should you bump into her in a bar or start dating one of her friends.
13. She posts comments on your social media statuses
If you get comments and likes on your social media pages, this is a sign she is very interested! She’s so attracted to you that she is thinking about you when you aren’t around. She can’t get enough so she is looking at photos of you and digging for info about your life – which is why it is a good idea to get your FB profile ready before you start dating!
14. Her schedule is suddenly very free
If a girl is interested in you, she will move hell and high water to be with you. This means she will cancel plans with friends, go out on a weeknight even if it means she will be bleary-eyed at work, or take two trains to meet you for lunch. By contrast, if a girl is always “busy”, then she probably isn’t interested. Yes, girls sometimes really are busy. But, if she is interested, she will always respond by suggesting another day or time to meet up.