Let’s begin with a question, “Is intimacy in a relationship important?”Most of will answer, “Yes.” Then, why is that couples struggle to stay connected and intimate in their relationships or marriages? This is a question most people find it difficult to answer. If the feelings and intimacy in a relationship are gone, is there a way they can be restored with focus and effort? Fortunately, it can.
Humans need intimacy. It is a basic human need. A romantic relationship needs intimacy. Without it, the relationship will never thrive and will die. So, if intimacy in a relationship is so important for a loving, long-lasting relationship, then why are couples failing to restore it, after it been lost? There are three primary reasons why couples find it difficult to be intimate in their relationship once again when their relationship breaks down.
Here is how you resolve those intimacy issues and restore your intimate connection:
1. Men And Women Look At Intimacy Differently
The key reason couples find it challenging to get intimacy back is that men and women have different takes when it comes to intimacy. For men, intimacy is a need for a physical connection that includes foreplay, holding hands, hugging, kissing, sexual intimacy, spending time alone together and doing things together. Meanwhile, for the ladies, intimacy is all about an emotional connection, sharing important issues, knowing one another’s hopes and dreams, listening about their husband’s or boyfriend’s day, being able to cry about emotional experiences, and being aware emotionally when emotions are hurt. Men view intimacy as being physical, which includes touching and sex. But, for women, it is all about talking intimately with their partners face-to-face.
2. Fear Of Intimacy
This is one of the main factors why some couples struggle to restore intimacy or even establish it in the first place in their relationships. Being insecure and the fear of getting hurt can seriously block emotional trust in a relationship. If couples are afraid of getting rejected, they’ll have problems to be physically intimate with each other again. Fear of disappointment or failure will prevent us from sharing our desires, expectations, hopes, and dreams, so we settle for less than we truly deserve. Some couples don’t truly engage will their partners because they fear abandonment. Another apparent reason men and women avoid intimacy is they fear they’ll lose their personalities and the qualities that define them. The only way to establish intimacy and save the relationship is to focus on establishing the connection and looking to the future.
3. Unable To Acknowledge The 6 Key Areas Of Intimacy
Most of us think that to have a lasting, fulfilling, and committed relationship, you only need one type of intimacy. But we need more than one type of intimacy for a successful relationship or marriage. Here are the six types of intimacy, such as self-intimacy, emotional intimacy, sexual intimacy, conflict intimacy, affection intimacy, and dream intimacy.
The bottom line is if we need to have a positive, happy and intimate relationship, we need to maintain a good relationship with ourselves. We need to know what we want and desire in a relationship, what makes us happy, and to know ourselves better at a deeper level. It’s the best approach to overcome any barriers or fears to intimacy.