Tag Archives: breaking up

6 Things You Learn From Having Your Heart Broken

One of the hardest things to go through is having your heart broken. For many of us, it will happen several times throughout life. The hardest time will always be the first, because you just don't know how to bounce back. It turns out, heartbreak isn't as bad as it may seem. It actually holds a lot of valuable lessons. Read on to find out the six things you'll learn from having your heart broken:

1. You Create Your Own Happiness

The initial feeling after a bad breakup is that your happiness is gone. You wonder how you could possibly be happy without this other person in your life. With some time, you will find that your happiness does not depend on another person. You have to create it yourself. Heartbreak will teach you to seek out things on your own that make you happy. It may be learning a new skill or starting a new hobby. It may be playing a sport or making artwork. Whatever it is, you'll realize that you are creating happiness for yourself without that other person.

2. It's Okay To Be Vulnerable

There are fewer things that make you more vulnerable than having your heart broken. Whether your ex left you abruptly, cheated on you, or just moved on, having someone reject you in that way can leave you feeling very vulnerable. While vulnerability is a totally normal human feeling, it often makes people feel embarrassed. Many people associate vulnerability with weakness, but that's just not the case. Heartbreak will help you to realize that being vulnerable after a breakup is totally natural and nothing to be ashamed of.

lessons from heartbreak

3. Time Heals Most Things

It sounds cliché, but the reality is that time really does heal almost anything. Immediately after a breakup, you'll feel so much pain and despair. It may feel like the end of the world, but this feeling will actually pass. You'll find that as time goes on, the pain gets less and less. Eventually you'll be able to think of your former partner and past relationship without feeling any pain at all.

4. You Need To Hold Yourself Accountable Sometimes

Self-accountability is a tricky thing for many people. A good thing that breakups teach us is how to hold ourselves accountable for what we do wrong. While your ex may be at fault for the breakup, it is still possible that you made some mistakes yourself. When you're healing from heartbreak, you learn how to look in the mirror and reflect on your part in the breakup. Were there things you could've done better? Are there things you'll do differently in your next relationship? Heartache is a very good teacher when it comes to self-accountability.

things heartbreak teaches

5. You Learn To Love Yourself

A lot of people feel totally worthless and unwanted after having their heart broken. As time goes on, this feeling will decrease and you will learn to love yourself for everything you are. This is especially true if you stay single for a while after the breakup. Being on your own gives you time for self reflection and time to grow. You learn to appreciate all the unique things about yourself and all the ways you're a great person. In the end, you'll be more confident than ever before!

6. Getting Back Up Is Easier Than You Thought

When someone breaks your heart, the initial feeling will be to retreat. You've been knocked to the ground and you probably feel like you want to crawl into a deep, dark hole. The thought of picking yourself up and moving on will seem like the most difficult, daunting thing in the world. As time passes, you'll see that getting back up is not as hard as it seems. Being happy and even finding love again is a lot easier than you ever expected. Before you know it, you'll have your life back on track and you'll wonder how it ever even got derailed.

lessons from a breakup

No Excuses: 3 Times You Should Leave Your Partner Immediately

When it comes to relationships, there are always going to be problems. No relationship is perfect. It all comes down to figuring out what you can and cannot work through. While there are many issues that can be dealt with, there are certain things that can never be remedied. In these instances, the best thing for you to do is leave. Read on to find out three times you should leave your partner immediately:

1. They're abusing you.

If your partner is emotionally or physically abusing you, there is no reason for you to stay with them. You need to leave them immediately. A person who hits you or subjects you to constant emotional abuse does not love you and will only get worse the longer you stay together. You need to value your life and your well-being and get far away from this person.

2. They're unfaithful.

If you're partner is cheating on you or has cheated on you, you should leave. Being unfaithful shows that your partner has no respect for you or the relationship. They do not care about hurting you or how their infidelity might make you feel. Staying with a partner who is unfaithful also puts your heath at risk by making you vulnerable to any sexually transmitted diseases they may get from someone else.

3. They are mistreating your children/pets.

Your children and your pets are completely dependent on the adults in their life. You need to make sure they are cared for and safe. If you've brought someone into their lives who is hurting them or mistreating hem, you need to leave that person. You do not want to be with the kind of person who would mistreat an innocent child or animal and you do not want to expose your children or pets to abuse.

leave your partner

Calling It Quits: The Top 5 Reasons Couples Break Up

Why do seemingly great couples break up? Have you ever looked at a couple and thought, “Why would they ever break up?” There are endless reasons a couple might call it quits, but there are a few things that will lead nearly any relationship to its end. Check out the top five reasons couples break up below:

1. Infidelity

Nothing will send a relationship into the trash quicker than infidelity. There are very, very few couples that can bounce back after one or both partners cheats, so most of couples decide to just break things off. For the most part, this is the wisest decision. After infidelity occurs, there is no trust in the relationship. Without trust, there's no relationship left to save.

2. Boredom

Boredom is one of the most common reasons couples break up because it is human nature to grow out of things. Almost every couple eventually encounters the dreaded boredom that comes with being in a long term relationship. In the beginning, everything about your partner was new and exciting. Once you've been with them for a while, you know them so well that you have no interest in them and ultimately decide to go your separate ways.

3. Finances

Finances are a huge problem for many couples and often lead to break ups. This mostly pertains to couples who are married or live together and have to split their bills. If your partner cannot manage their money and you are stuck carrying the weight of all your financial burdens, it's likely that you'll want to get away from them.

4. Different Life Goals

A very common reason for breaking up is that each partner has different life goals. Small goals, like wanting to learn a new hobby, are actually beneficial and healthy for relationships. It's good to have different hobbies. However, when you have larger life goals that differ, such as wanting to have kids versus not having kids, you will not be able to reconcile these differences.

5. Bad Habits

Few things are more toxic for a relationship than bad habits or vices. If you or your partner gambles, smokes compulsively, or drinks excessively, things are going to head South very quickly. It's almost impossible to maintain a healthy relationship with someone who has bad habits like these and for that reason, these relationships burn out very quickly.

reasons couples break up

The 3 Worst Ways To Break Up With Someone

Breaking up is hard to do. No one would call it easy! While breaking up is hard for person who is doing the “breaking up,” it's even harder for the person who is being broken up with. In order to not hurt this person any more than you have to, you need to handle the breakup with care and sensitivity. This means that you need to break up in a manner that shows you respect the person and the time you spent with them. The best way to break up with someone is in person, but it seems like some people think other methods are okay. We're here to tell you the three worst ways to break up with someone. Check them out below!

1. Social Media

Social media has become so ever-present in our lives that some people actually think it is an acceptable place to break up with someone. Social media is the worst of the worst ways to break up with someone! It is so inappropriate, it will basically tell the other person that you didn't care about them at all. While it's bad enough to break up with someone in a direct message on Facebook, it's even worse if you do it publicly on their timeline! Just steer clear of this!

2. Text Message

While texting has become the standard form of communication for well, all of us, it's definitely not okay to break up over a text message. Texting is too informal and impersonal for breaking up, which is almost always a delicate situation. If you absolutely cannot break up with someone in person, actually calling them on the phone is a much better option than texting them.

3. Email

Do people even email one another anymore? Email has become an act reserved strictly for formal matters like work conversations. When you open up your email, you expect to see a message from your boss – not your partner breaking up with you. Breaking up with someone over an email is just plain strange and hurtful. It kind of shows that you viewed your relationship as a business relationship that you could just terminate over an email!

worst ways to break up with someone

Time To Say Goodbye: 5 Signs That You Need To Break Up

Do you feel like your relationship is nearing the end? Have you considered breaking up with your partner but you're just not sure? There are a few ways to tell if it's time to call it quits. Check out five signs that you need to break up with your partner:

1. There Is Emotional or Physical Abuse

Any kind of abuse should never be taken lightly. This is the biggest sign that you need to break up with your partner. If you are suffering from emotional or physical abuse, it's time to leave. No one should stay in an abusive relationship. Likewise, if you have become abusive to your partner, the two of you need to separate and you need to seek treatment for your abusive tendencies.

2. One Of You Has Cheated

Very few couples can recover from infidelity. Bouncing back depends on the circumstances and the couple themselves. For the majority of couples, it's time to break up once one of you has cheated. Cheating means that either you or your partner has given up on the relationship and it's not likely it can be saved.

3. You're Attracted to Other People

Everyone admires people other than your partner. Noticing attractive strangers is just human nature. However, if you find yourself genuinely attracted to someone else in a way that you want to be in a relationship with them rather than your partner, you need to break up.

4. You Can't See A Future Together

You and your partner may have once envisioned a future together, but if you can't do that anymore, it's time to break up. If you imagine what your future will look like and your partner is not in it, it's time to let them go now so that you can both pursue what you want in life.

5. You Have A Gut Feeling

There is a lot to be said for intuition. Sometimes you just know when something isn't right. If you have a gut feeling that you need to break up with your partner, it's probably because the relationship has run its course.

breaking up

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do: The 7 Stages Of A Breakup

They weren't lying when they said, “breaking up is hard to do.” (We're not exactly sure who “they” are, but they're right!) Breakups are stressful, painful and sometimes downright traumatizing. In fact, breakups are such an ordeal, they occur in multiple stages! Let us fill you in on the seven stages of a breakup:

1. Shock

Immediately after a breakup, you're likely to be in shock. You'll wonder how it happened or why you didn't see it coming. You may feel totally blindsided and not able to comprehend that your relationship is over.

2. Denial

Denial is one of the most difficult stages of a breakup to get past. You'll spend a lot of time denying the fact that you're relationship is really over. You'll convince yourself that you and your ex are just going through a hard time and you'll get back together soon. You'll tell yourself anything, even if it's totally delusional.

3. Isolation

Once the denial has passed and you realize that your relationship is truly done, you'll want to isolate yourself from the world. You might lock yourself in your room and listen to music. You may isolate yourself to your apartment and binge-watch television. You'll avoid your friends and spend all of your time to yourself.

4. Anger

At this point in the breakup, anger is going to set in. You'll start to lash out at the mere mention of your ex. You may even reach out to them and fight with them, telling them how wrong they were to end the relationship. You're feeling a lot of anger and resentment at your ex for putting you in this position.

5. Bargaining

This stage of a breakup is when you start imaging a reunion with your ex. You may start thinking of trying to get them back. You'll start figuring out ways to win them back, like changing your appearance or taking up new hobbies.

6. Depression

This is one of the hardest stages of a breakup. Your stuck in the transition between bargaining and acceptance. Part of you still wants your ex and the other part of you has accepted that it is over. This combination makes you feel incredibly confused and depressed. You'll probably think that you cannot move on with your life because your heart is at a standstill.

7. Acceptance

This is the final stage of a breakup. You have fully accepted that the relationship is over. While you may not be entirely ready to move on, you have at least accepted that you're not going to be with your ex. You can acknowledge why the relationship ended, where both you and your partner went wrong, and how you plan to move forward.

stages of a breakup

Moving On: 5 Ways To Move On From A Long Term Relationship

Breakups are rough, but they're even worse if it's the end of a long term relationship. The longer you've been together, the harder it will be to get past the breakup. You may feel like you'll never get over it but if you take the right steps, you'll be able to move on. We want to help you move forward with your love life, so we've got five ways to move on from a long term relationship. Check them out here:

1. Take Some Time To Yourself

The best way to move on from a long term relationship is to take some time to yourself. If you were in a relationship for years, it's been a long time since you've been on your own. You need to take this time to be alone and focus on yourself. You can start a new hobby. You can read books or watch movies you've never seen. Just take the time to enjoy being alone before you move on to a new relationship.

2. Envision A New Future For Yourself

To move on from a long term relationship, you need to start envisioning a new future for yourself. When you've been in a relationship for a long time, you probably envisioned your future being with your partner. Now that you're not together, you need to imagine what a future without them is going to look like. This may include new career aspirations or moving to a new location. It may include nothing new at all. Either way, you need to look to the future at this point.

3. Take A Critical Look At the Past

When a relationship ends, you spend a lot of time dwelling on it. We don't want you to dwell on the past, but we do want you to look back at your relationship in a critical way. Be honest with yourself about what went wrong. This will help you to realize what you're looking for in your next relationship. It will help you to see what you want in a partner and what you don't want. It will also help you to avoid making the same mistakes you may have made in the past.

4. Spend Time With Friends and Family

Another great way to move on from a long term relationship is to spend time with friends and family. Spending time with your loved ones will distract you from sitting around and feeling sad. It will also help you to see how much the other people in your life care about you and how they are there for you when you need it.

5. Look At Things Positively

It never ever hurts to look at things positively. This can be applied to anything in life, but especially to bad breakups. Focus on all the good things in your life. Focus on all the good things about yourself. Look to the future and think of what great things may lie ahead. This will help you to move on from the end of your long term relationship.

moving on after breakup

Bouncing Back: 4 Benefits Of Being In A Rebound Relationship

You've probably hear that “rebound relationships” are a bad idea. Throwing yourself into a new relationship immediately after a bad breakup probably seems like a disaster waiting to happen, but it's actually not. Rebound relationships can be very helpful when it comes to moving forward with your love life. Check out four great benefits of being in a rebound relationship.

It Will Distract You From Thinking About Your Ex

When you start dating someone new, your focus and energy will be invested in them. You'll be thinking of your new partner and the budding relationship so much that you'll forget all about the ex who broke your heart. The rebound relationship will help you to forget all about the relationship that just failed.

It Boosts Your Self Esteem

The beginning of a relationship is always great for someone's self esteem. If you're just coming out of a bad breakup, your confidence and self esteem may be damaged. Your new partner may be just the thing you need to boost your confidence. Seeing that someone else is interested in you other than your ex will make you feel good again.

It Keeps You From Wallowing

Focusing your energy on a new relationship will keep you from wallowing in sadness over the end of your previous relationship. After a bad breakup you're often left wondering what went wrong or what you could have done differently. If you jump into a rebound relationship, you can focus on that relationship instead of obsessing over the old one.

It Could Be The Real Deal

There is no inherent rule in the universe that says a rebound relationship can't turn into a legitimate thing. Many rebound relationships actually become healthy, long-lasting ones. Maybe you wound up in your rebound relationship by way of fate and things are meant to be. Don't write the relationship off as “only a rebound” when it could wind up being happily ever after.


Nearing the End: 3 Major Signs That It’s Time To Break Up

Breaking up is hard to do. Maybe you've been contemplating breaking up with your partner for a while now but you're just not sure if it's the right choice. You don't want to call it quits if there's a chance things can turn around. However, do you really want to waste anymore time in a relationship that is heading down the wrong road? To help you out, we've got three major signs that it's time to break up.

Someone Is Lying All the Time

Whether it's you or your partner, if someone in the relationship is lying all the time, you need to break up. If your partner is lying to you, they have some issues with your relationship and should not be in it anymore. Also, you don't deserve to be lied to constantly. On the flip side, if you are the one who is constantly lying, there is something wrong in the relationship. Why do you feel that you need to lie to your partner? If you feel like you need to keep things from this person, maybe you shouldn't be with them anymore.

Neither Person Is Concerned With the Other's Feelings

If both of you have stopped caring, it's probably time to call it quits. If you're no longer concerned with how your partner feels, you shouldn't be in the relationship anymore. The same goes for them. If one or both of you have stopped putting in the effort because you just don't care about the other's happiness, then the relationship is basically over already. You might as well throw in the towel.

You Have A Gut Feeling

There is a lot to be said for intuition. If your intuition is telling you that the relationship is over, the relationship is probably over. When you have a gut feeling about something being wrong, it's typically because something is in fact wrong. Listen to what your intuition is trying to tell you. If you just know that it's time to break up, then it's most likely time to break up.

Breaking Up

Letting Go: 6 Great Ways to Move On From Your Ex

Breaking up is hard to do. While your breakup may have been a great idea, you might find it impossible to move on from your ex. Whether it be obsessing over your memories together or stalking them on Facebook, you cannot let yourself be preoccupied with your ex. We understand that moving on can be difficult, so we've got a few tips to get you started. Check out six great ways to move on from your ex:

1. Cut Off All Contact

The first step to move on from your ex is to cut off all contact with them. Don't call them. Don't text them. Delete them from your social media accounts. Staying in touch with your ex will make it impossible to drop your feelings for them. If you really want to get over them, you need to avoid them.

2. Spend Time With Friends and Family

A great way to get your mind off your ex is by spending time with your friends and family. Go out with your friends. Have dinner with your family. Spending time with people who care about you will help boost your self esteem and make you feel better about moving forward.

3. Start A New Hobby

Picking up a new hobby is an excellent way to move on from your ex. Focusing on a new hobby will distract you from obsessing over your ex. Whether it be painting or taking a cooking class, you might find that your love your new hobby! If not, you can always try several different things until you find what suits you. Either way, a new hobby will take your mind off your ex.

4. See A New Place

Exploring a new place will definitely help you move on from your ex. Take a vacation with some close friends or go on a family trip. Seeing a new place helps to show you how big the world is and that there are so many other things out there. You'll forget all about your previous relationship once you see what the rest of the world has in store for you.

5. Avoid Memories of Them

A huge part of moving on is letting go of old memories. If you want to move on from your ex, you need to avoid obsessing over the memories you share. Don't look at old photo albums. Don't listen to their favorite song on repeat for hours. Avoid all the things that remind you of them. We're not saying you have to throw out old pictures or gifts they gave you. You just need to avoid them until you are sure you've moved on.

6. Meet New People

The best way to move on from your ex is to meet new people. We understand you may not be ready to start dating again, and you don't have to date anyone. You can just get out there and meet new people to hang out with. You don't need to dive into anything serious. Just hanging out with new people will show you that there are plenty of other fish in the sea and before you know it, you'll forget all about your ex.

Moving On