First dates are always awkward. It’s okay to feel that way, as both people don’t know much about each other. Most men and women tend to refrain from showing their true colors or personality on the first couple of dates because they are afraid they’ll get rejected. But, by hiding who we really are and withholding our thoughts and feelings, we’re doing a disservice to ourselves.
In dating and relationships, rejection is inevitable. It’s a part of the dating process. When dealing with rejection, it’s imperative to understand that being yourself is the more challenging thing to do. Instead, you think you’ll be better off if you put on an act. If you’re okay with this approach, any criticism you feel will not be a direct attack on you who you are as an individual. Though, it’s natural to feel scared to be yourself during the first two dates. But if the relationship gets a chance to nurture, your true colors will come out eventually.
So, what does it really mean to be yourself?
Sometimes in life, when it comes to dating, most of us put on an act. During the first few dates, we tend to be more polite and considerate. We pretend that we’re interested in topics that she is interested in, even if we aren’t. We partake in tasks and activities that we wouldn’t normally do or enjoy, rather than being open and honest. Sooner or later, our act gets exposed and she eventually discovers who we really are. And this is the reason she's not asking you for a second date. Being yourself isn’t holding you back from who you are with your family, friends, and coworkers. This is why some people like double dating, because it gives both parties the chance to see how their dates are around their buddies. It is very different from who they are when they are in a one-on-one encounter.
Do you know what you’re looking for in a partner or a relationship?
During the first, second, or third dates, it’s difficult to communicate what you’re looking for in a partner or a relationship. In most situations, we don’t know what we’re really looking for. The harsh truth is that many of us go on dates without knowing what we want. Dating gives us the opportunity to witness and interact with different types of people and relationships. Still, if you’re firm about getting into a serious and committed relationship, don’t get involved with a woman who isn’t sure about what she wants, unless you’re adamant about taking the risk of getting hurt. However, these opinions and feelings eventually will change as you and your girlfriend get to know one another, but you’ll need a little luck and a lot of honesty and patience.
Breakups are tough and painful no matter how you do them, but they’re easier if done earlier in the relationship. Ending things with your partner early, between the first and fifth date, will be easier because both of you are less emotionally invested in the relationship.
Instead of focusing too much on how to be a good date, focus on how to love being yourself. You’ll be surprised how successful your dating life and relationships will be if you feel confident, secure, and comfortable with yourself from the beginning.