Anyone who has been dating is bound to come across the word rejection. Rejection can come if you see your online messages aren’t being answered, or while on a first date the another person hasn’t returned your calls, or you got dumped the moment you were just started going out, all rejections have one thing in common — they hurt real bad. What’s more upsetting about rejections is – our inability to understand what went wrong, which might easily lead us to self-criticism. All this self-inflicted punishment makes us feel utterly miserable and can lose confidence, desperate and emotionally weak.
However, there is a way to rebound from rejection, find your happiness back, move on and return to the dating world. Below are three steps to help you cope with the emotional pain inflicted after being rejected:
Although it’s understandable to self-criticize after a rejection, there is a little benefit in that. Most rejections have nothing particular to do with any personal flaws or shortcomings. Instead, they have much to do with chemistry and compatibility. You might think the other person is interested in you, but in reality, he or she isn’t interested enough. And if they felt compatible with you, it’s very likely you too will feel it at some point. Thus, stop blaming yourself or think that you have some perceived flaws after being rejected.
Reinvigorate Your Self-Esteem
Now that you have spared yourself from the evil clutches of self-criticism, it’s time to revive your self-esteem. And the right way to do that is to remind you again and again about your qualities and attributes you possess which you believe makes you great. Make a list of qualities you have and think are invaluable for dating and maintain a relationship. Say you are loyal, caring, lovable, supportive, passionate, considerate, a good cook, a great listener, a good kisser, and so on.
Now, choose anyone of those attributes and write a short essay, and explain why this quality is important to you, why your future spouse will find it indispensable, how this has helped you with dating and being in relationships before, and so on. Try to write one or two brief paragraphs until you start to feel better about yourself. Remember that this exercise will have a positive impact on your self-esteem, only if you write.
Regain Your Sense of Belonging
The reason why rejection has sharp emotional pain is that we feel to lose our sense of belonging. We, humans always wanted to be “loved” and “need to belong” to someone or a group, it is this sense of we have become every sensitive to rejection. So, to regain your sense of belonging, reach out to your friends and family members for support if you happen to be a victim of rejection.
Rejections are very common forms emotional pain that unfortunately doesn't go away soon. However, by taking these three steps will make your healing process easier, boost up your confidence, and get you back on the dating scene again stronger than ever.