When it comes to marriage advice, some of it is worth ignoring. When you’ve decided to get married, suddenly you see that surrounded with friends, family and other people full of well-meant advice. There are some that are good, while there are some which we ignored. Then there is some advice that we are glad we forgot. Here are top five of them:
Advice #1: Don't Go To Bed Angry
Why not? You know what, do it. It’s perfectly fine to be a little angry and cranky sometimes. Also, going to sleep a little angry gives you a breather. You get a fresh perspective and come to terms that whatever you’re arguing about aren’t as important than the feelings of your spouse.
Advice #2: Only Use Words Like “I Feel” Instead “It Is How It Is.”
When talking with your partner speak in a way that means what it is really instead of how you feel about it. For example, it doesn’t make any sense when you tell your husband that forgetting to wipe the counters makes you “feel” that he doesn’t respect or love you. Instead, ask him to help your around in the household, and give him a list of chores that he feels comfortable doing. Sure, feelings can come in handy during fights, but for everyday tasks, sometimes it’s best just to ask for help for the job done.
Advice #3: People Don't Change
We all heard a lot that people don’t change whether they’re single, in a relationship or are married. Folks tell us not to expect any changes of their husbands or wives, and only to accept him or her as they are. But, this statement isn’t always true and can be preposterous to some extent. If you get married with that mindset, then you’re just prepping up for disappointment. You can see a lot of couples where both partners have changed themselves in small ways and big ways. You see that your husband is more sensitive to your feelings now, and also you around a lot to do chores.
Advice #4: Apologize, Even If You Aren't Sorry or Did Anything Wrong
When you’re in a committed relationship or married, it’s better, to tell the truth, and apologize for it, then lie to your partner. Even if you’re arguing, nobody likes to be appeased or patronized. Don’t be sorry or be apologetic for leaving all the lights on in the house or not doing the dishes after dinner. There isn’t anything seriously wrong or harmful in these activities, so stop with the insincere apologies.
Advice #5: Always Let Him Know How You Feel
This advice might work to some extent, but when you’re married, sometimes it's better just to withhold your feelings. Many women don’t suck up their emotions and tell about every single little thing to their partners, and honestly speaking it can cause a lot of problems. Feelings and your inner thoughts are fleeting. Sometimes, you might be irritated by your husband watching football with you for hours, but the next time he does it, you’ll feel charmed. The problem isn't him; it’s because your emotions are short-lived. When you’re in a relationship, letting your significant other know how you feel about everything, isn’t the way to go. But getting control of your emotions and figuring out what's worth discussing and what’s necessary bringing to the table before sharing is the best effort for a healthy and lasting marriage.