The reasons for a breakup could be plenty, but primarily there are just two situations; either you have initiated the breakup or the other person has broken up. These two sides of a breakup have different ways of dealing with it, explained below.
When you break up with someone!
- Understand; before you jump to any conclusions, it is important that you first analyze the situation and see how you have acted in all of it. You should carry out a little self-reflection of yourself where you know exactly why you did that and what triggered it and also if you were right or not.
- Be Honest; you have, to be honest throughout the course. There is no use in lying about events or making false statements about the other person. If there is anything that can help, then that is if you deal with everything the honest way and accept even if you have made some mistakes. Also, even after a breakup, you should remain honest, and not continue with the “just friends” phase when you cannot actually handle it.
- Never drag; it sure is difficult to break it, someone, that you no longer want to continue the relationship or that they don’t mean that special to you anymore but despite the difficulty, you should never drag it. The sooner you inform the other person, the better it will be; otherwise, you will just be ruining each other’s time.
- Be kind but sure; breakups are not supposed to be full of anger and hatred. They can be dealt in a mature and kind way but then again, in that kindness too you must convey the real message.
When someone breaks up with you!
- Dignity first; dealing with a breakup news is surely sad and heartbreaking, but you need to learn how to put yourself together at that time. You should control yourself not to scream or attack anyone/anything.
- Get support; the best way to deal with the news is to go to a close friend or family member. Going to them and sharing your feelings or even crying will help you get over the initial stress of a breakup. This is also safe for you compared to if you were all alone and at the risk of doing something bad to yourself.
- Don’t blame yourself; blaming yourself is not healthy at all because it is them who broke up not you. Blaming yourself the whole life will always be toxic to our emotional health. You need to tell yourself that you gave your best to the relationship and that it was the other person who was not competent enough to handle it.
- Learn from it; as much as you tell yourself that it was the other person’s fault, but still you should have an attitude where you are ready to accept that you’re not perfect either. In fact, a self-evaluation would work best here.