It’s common to see couples complaining that their relationship has become stale and passionless after a few years. They complain that the romance isn’t there like when they first met or when they got married. Couples who are in long-term relationships say that things aren’t the same between them. They also admitted that they don’t feel sexually attracted to each other like before and the gestures of showing love for each other have also changed.
Yes, the relationship will evolve, but that doesn’t mean that the union should be devoid of any passion and affection. You can’t have a healthy and comfortable relationship if the two people in it refuse to grow and learn. So, to spice up a passionless marriage, it is crucial to identify the patterns of a comfortable relationship. From that point, you and your spouse can learn how to commit to each other in a much better way in the future.
Understanding Patterns of a Relationship
Relationship patterns are all about how we act and behave through our interactions, needs and wants.
Everyone has a different relationship pattern. These relationship patterns are exposed according to the kind of action or behavior our spouses show during various stages or phases of the relationship. Some of these are good, while there are some that can be quite destructive. When positive patterns emerge in the relationship, it can add enjoyment and depth to the relationship. These positive patterns will help the relationship to develop and thrive. On the other hand, negative patterns create unhappiness in the relationship. Good patterns are required to be displayed and communicated for the love and care for your partner, and to make him or her feel desirable to you. In a comfortable relationship, the pattern isn’t entirely negative like an abusive relationship. But, it can become negative if you are spending a lot of time and energy on supporting and remaining committed to each other. If you see patterns like these emerging in your relationship, take initiatives in combat them so that your relationship gets a new lease on life and turns into a healthy and happy relationship again.
Spice Up Your Comfortable Relationship
A comfortable relationship can be a trap. A comfortable relationship creates a relationship that has no personal boundaries. For example, if you and your partner are in the same room minding your business with no interaction and activity to do things together as a couple, it’s safe to say that your relationship has become too comfortable. Be careful; it’s at this stage that the relationship becomes static.
You can spice up a marriage that is passionless, yet comfortable, by improving the connection and interaction. The depth and quality of the connection is more important than the quantity of the interaction like binge-watching your favorite TV shows together. But creating such deep connections requires time and some effort. Volunteering together or taking a cooking class as a couple will be helpful here. Also set aside time for deep communication. Partners should open up and have deep discussions about things that matter to the relationship and each other. Do both the small and big things for your spouse. Show appreciation, care, and affection to each other, and go on adventures, holidays, and tours together.