How many times have you heard that “beauty is only skin deep?” Have you ever been called shallow when it comes to dating? Do your friends and family think that you put too much emphasis on looks when it comes to finding a partner? We're here to tell you: That's totally okay.
For whatever reason, we currently live in a society that demonizes people for appreciating someone's beauty or attractiveness. If you start dating someone because of how they look rather than their personality, you're condemned for being “too shallow.” On the flipside, if you don't date someone because of how they look, you're condemned for being too shallow. Apparently, we are supposed to completely ignore someone's appearance when it comes to dating. We'd like to explain why this makes absolutely no sense!
First things first, we want to make this absolutely clear: No one has to fit society's standard of “beauty.” There are many different types of beauty and many different ways that someone can be considered beautiful. With that said, everyone should be free to date whomever they want, for whatever reason they want. If someone wants to date a conventionally beautiful woman who has an awful personality, that's their choice. If someone wants to date a conventionally handsome man with an awful personality, that's their choice. You cannot dictate one person's reasons for dating another.
We see it like this: In a romantic relationship, you should be attracted to your partner. Isn't attraction the very thing that separates a friendship from a relationship? If you enjoy someone's personality but you don't find them physically attractive, they're your friend. Just because someone has a great personality, it doesn't mean you should be in a romantic relationship with them. Let's be real – relationships entail a lot more than conversations and just hanging out. You don't kiss someone's sense of humor. You don't have sex with someone's good manners. While these characteristics are important in a partner, without physical attraction, you can't build a healthy relationship.
How many people do you know that have tried to have relationships with someone who was their best friend? We all know someone who had a really good friend, someone they loved spending time with, and they decided to try dating them. Ultimately, it probably ended because they just couldn't see them as “more than a friend.” What was the problem there? No physical attraction! It's very simple: If you don't like the way someone looks, you're not going to be physically attracted to them.
In conclusion, we are totally in favor of being shallow when it comes to dating. After all, how good does it feel to have someone beautiful to look at? Obviously, you need to look for someone who has good personality traits (sense of humor, kindness, stability) to have a healthy, well-rounded relationship. But don't let anyone tell you that you're wrong when you also look for someone with a nice face and a good body!